The Underestimation of Sam Merlotte Part 2

Well, damn. I was in bed with Sam Merlotte, and we were both going to sleep.

Damn indeed!

WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS SPOILERS FROM DEAD EVER AFTER. Also if anyone out there is actually reading my Mallory Reads blogs (sorry about the lack of updates in two months btw) then hold off on reading this until whenever I finish those. Or maybe don’t unless you’re super patient cause it might take a while.

Moving on…

I assume by now fans have all read the final Sookie book, myself included. And all I have to say is… I. Was. Right.

I know there are many unhappy people out there right about now, but I can’t say I’m sorry cause that would be a lie. I knew Sookie and Sam were meant to be and that their relationship was progressing throughout the series and I’m super, very, extremely happy they ended up together.

So now… for those who do love Sam as much as I do… here are some of the good parts from Dead Ever After.

Remember how I said several characters had mentioned their relationship in the previous books? Well, that gets sent into overdrive in this one.

I called Merlotte’s and told Kennedy I had the flu. She agreed they’d call me in a crisis, but otherwise they’d leave me alone to recover. “I didn’t think anyone got the flu in July. But Sam called in to say the same thing,” Kennedy said with a smile in her voice. I thought, Dammit. “Maybe y’all gave it to each other?” she suggested archly.

About Eric: He’d been the one to skedaddle when I’d raised Sam from the dead, because (I figured) he was sure it meant I loved Sam more than I loved him.

Bill sat forward on the couch, his dark brows raised. “Ask yourself this,” he said. “Would you have used the cluviel dor if it had been—say, Terry or Calvin—who was mortally wounded?” I was stunned by the question. I groped for words. After a moment, Bill got up to leave. “I didn’t think so,” he said. I scrambled to my feet to follow him to the door. “It’s not that I think Terry’s life, anyone’s life, isn’t worth a sacrifice,” I said. “It’s that it might not ever have occurred to me.” “And I’m not saying you’re a bad woman for that hesitation, Sookie,” Bill told me, reading my face accurately. He put a cold hand to my cheek. “You’re one of the best women I’ve ever met. However, sometimes you don’t know yourself very well.”

“What are you to him?” Bernie looked me right in the eyes. “I’m his friend, his good friend, and I’m his business partner now.” “Uh-huh.” She eyed me in a way I could only describe as skeptical. “And you sacrificed an irreplaceable artifact to save his life?” “I wish you’d quit bringing that up,” I said, and winced. I’d sounded like a ten-year-old. “I was glad to do it,” I added in a more adult tone. “Your boyfriend, this Eric, left the werewolf land right after.” She was drawing some incorrect conclusions. “Yeah…it’s a long story. He didn’t expect me to use the cluviel dor like that. He thought I should use it to…” “Use it to benefit him.”….”So Sam’s alive, you’re out a boyfriend, and Jannalynn’s dead.”

“You know I would never leave home to live some kind of half-life as your girl on the side sneaking sex from time to time until Freyda found out I was there and killed me. Going through the same humiliation that I did tonight. Over and over.” “I should have known you would never leave Sam,” Eric said, with heavy bitterness.

Eric had been angry at losing control of his own life. Further, Eric was convinced Sam was waiting in the wings to take his place in my bed. There were some implications that I’d store away to think about later.

Sookie to Sam: “I guess Eric read you better than I did. He knew if he let me go, you were standing first in line waiting.”

Tara: “Sam had to go do some paperwork, so he asked me if I could come over to stay for a few minutes. He said you’d started tossing and turning.” She tried very hard not to stare significantly at the dent in the pillow beside me. “Hey, sleeping was all that went on,” I told her. “With the vamp gone, the door’s wide open,” she said innocently. “Nobody to say nothing about how you spend your time. You’re a free woman.” “I’m just saying, that’s premature.” I gave her a no-nonsense look. “All righty. If that’s the way you want to play it.”

So yes, characters have noticed. And some of them aren’t happy about it. Namely Eric.

“Here’s Part Two of the bad Eric stuff. He told me I would be seeing him tonight, but he warned me I wouldn’t like it. It sounded pretty official.  I kind of have to go, if I’m not in jail, that is.” I tried to smile. “It’s not going to be fun.” “You want me to come with you?” That was an amazing offer. I appreciated it, and I said so.  But I had to add, “I think have to get through this by myself, Sam. Just now, the sight of you might make Eric more…upset.”

“Your heart stopped beating. I used my cluviel dor to heal you and bring you back.” “You were calling me. You told me to live.” Now he was finally looking at me directly, meeting my eyes. “Yes,” I said. “I remember opening my eyes again to see your face.” “Your heart started beating again,” I said, as the enormity of it swept over me. My skin tingled all over. “Eric was standing behind you, looking down at us as though he hated us,” Sam said.

But her friends know what’s up.

“Sam came by to ask if I needed anything,” Amelia told me. “Not surprised. He’s a good guy.”… “One of the best.”

It’s true that Sam hasn’t always run to the rescue when Sookie kept getting herself into trouble. But it’s only because he was giving her the freedom to live her life her way. Plus I think he was internally conflicted about his own life a lot of the time. But he’s still been there when Sookie needed him.

“You know I’m here if you need me. I’ve got your back, Sook.” “I got a real nasty message on my answering machine, Sam. It kind of scared me”… “I didn’t recognize the number it came from. Andy Bellefleur said he’d look into it. I’m just saying that what with one thing and another, I’m grateful that you said that. It means a lot. You’ve always been there for me.” “No,” he said. “Not always. But I am, now.”

In this last book when Sam was being very un-Sam-like, we see that Sookie was very concerned about it.

I went directly to my locker and opened it, wondering if I’d see Sam behind the bar, how he’d be, what he’d say…If Sam wanted to talk to me, there was time. But when I walked up front, the person behind the bar was Kennedy Keyes. I felt distinctly deflated.

Well, if Sam had made her—or someone else—such a promise, there didn’t seem to be anything I could do about it, but I would put the situation on the back burner of things that worried me. When there was room on the front burner, I’d move it forward. Because it sure made me hurt inside.

So I had plenty to do, but throughout the busy-ness of my hands and thoughts, I was unhappily aware that I hadn’t heard from Sam.

After years of having what I considered a happy relationship with Sam—for the most part—with no effort at all, now that I’d actually made a sacrifice for him, we were down to e-mails and mysterious silences.

That last part was mostly a muted blahblahblah. Sam was all right.

Like I said in my last blog, they are friends. The best of.

Sam had always been my friend, though we’d had our ups and our downs and our arguments.

Sam put an arm around my shoulders and tried to smile. “They say your best friend will help you move a body,” he said. “You must be my best friend.” “I am,” I said.

It’s pretty obvious that she loves him.

I hadn’t even made a conscious decision to use the cluviel dor to save Sam; I’d acted instinctively when I saw him die.

I realized I might not have used the cluviel dor if I’d had time to think about it. I might have doubted it would work, and that doubt would have weakened my will. My witch friend Amelia had told me once that magic was all about will. I’d had plenty of will when I’d felt Sam’s heart quit beating.

And we know he loves her.

Sam came in silently. His hand found mine. “You gonna tell me what’s wrong?” I whispered. I was fading into sleep. “I can’t,” he said. “But I couldn’t stay away when I heard you got shot.”

Sam’s presence behind the bar was reassuring. And his eyes followed me, as if he were constantly thinking of me, too.

He even went to Eric to help Sookie get out of jail when he couldn’t manage it on his own. Eric had a problem with his pride that I don’t think Sam had. Which, in this case, puts extra points in the shifter’s corner.

“I have to shower and put on clean clothes and, I guess…go in to work. If Sam wants me there. I might not be such an advertisement for the place now.” “Are you kidding? He went nuts when he heard they arrested you,” Jason said… “He did?” “Yeah, he went to the station to yell at Andy and Alcee Beck on Sunday. Then he called the jail about a million times to ask how you were doing. And he asked the judge who the best criminal lawyer in the area was…”

Sam: “None of us had enough money for your bail. I wasn’t going to have you spend any more time in that place than you had to. I called the bank president at home to ask him about a loan on the bar, but I got turned down.”

Additionally, as I have been saying for a while now, I never thought Sookie wanted to be a vampire. And even though in some of the books she didn’t think she would ever get the chance to have a normal life, I still feel like she wanted one. And in this book, we finally get a straight up answer.

But still…I would not be a vampire for him. I loved being human. I loved the sunshine; I love the daytime; I loved to stretch out on a chaise lounge in the backyard with the light surrounding me. And though I was not a good Christian, I was a Christian. I didn’t know what would happen to my soul if I was turned into a vampire, and I didn’t want to risk it—especially since I’d done some pretty bad things in my time. I wanted some years to atone.

“I want to make sure. I don’t want any more impulse relationships or relationships that could kill me. I don’t want any secret agendas or misunderstandings on a massive scale. I’ve done enough of that. Call me chicken, if it seems I’m being cowardly. I want something different now.”

Here are some of the sweeter moments:

To my surprise, Sam hugged me, and we stood in the shade of the tree for a long moment, water dripping down on us as the rain died away to a light drizzle.

“I remember you wearing that scarf last winter. You wore it to church, tied around your ponytail, with a black dress.” Well. You never know what men will remember. I started to feel a little touched and tender.

So my brother and I went out onto the dance floor. I saw Sam watching, smiling, and I felt truly happy. I knew it might be only for a moment, but I was willing to take it when I could get it.

I’m pretty sure my mouth actually dropped when I got to this part:

“I’m just relieved that you’re okay now. You did the best you could when you thought of it, and your whole reason to agree to such a stupid thing was to get me out of a terrible situation. How can I not be grateful for that?” “I don’t want you grateful,” he said. “I want you mine. Eric was right about that.”

“Maybe I felt then like you’re feeling now. Maybe I felt like I’d come so close to forever-death that I’d better step back and take a look at my life. Maybe I didn’t like a lot of what I’d done with it so far…I didn’t like my choices in women…I think I’m ready to begin a relationship…a partnership…with someone I respect and admire.” “Rather than?” “Rather than another sociopathic bitch who just offers excitement and wild sex….Someone I respect and admire whom I also suspect is capable of exciting and wild sex…”

It was really nice to hear Sam confess his feelings to Sookie. Since book five, he hasn’t indicated he wanted more than friendship. And even before that, I don’t think he’d ever actually said he wanted to be with her.

And now here is a most incredible part of the book that is not for the kiddies. It’s pretty long but I couldn’t, in good conscience, leave any of it out.

“You got stuff in your hair,” I said, and he titled his head down to me. His hair was always such a tangle, of course he wouldn’t have even felt anything in there. I removed one twig with great care, then extricated a leaf. I had to get very close to do that. Gradually, as I worked, I became aware that Sam was standing absolutely still. The air was still, too…Sam’s hand came up to take mine the next time I reached up to his hair. He held it against his chest, and he looked at me. I came a few inches closer. He bent his head and kissed me. The air around us seemed to tremble in the heat. After a long, long kiss, Sam came up for air. “All right?” he asked quietly. I nodded. “All right,” I whispered, and our lips touched again, this time with more fire. I was completely pressed up against him now, and with only a bikini and gauze cover-up on me and shorts on him, we were sharing plenty of skin. Hot, oily, scented skin. Sam made a noise deep in his throat that sounded suspiciously like a growl. “You mean it?” he asked. “I do,” I said, and the kiss deepened, though I hadn’t thought that possible. This was so fireworks and Fourth of July and oh my God I wanted him so bad. I thought if we didn’t get down to it soon I was going to explode, and not in the way I needed to. “Please don’t change your mind,” he said, and began walking me back to the trailer. “I think I’d have to go out and shoot something.” “Not gonna happen,” I said, working at the button on his shorts. He said, “Hold up your arms,” and I did, and the gauze cover-up was history. We’d made it to the trailer door, and he reached behind me to turn the knob. We tumbled into the dark interior of the trailer, and though I paused by the couch, he said, “No, a real bed.” He picked me up and turned sideways to get us through the narrow trailer hall, and then we were in his bedroom and there was indeed a bed, in fact a king-sized one. “Yay,” I said as he laid me on the bed and joined me, practically in one movement, and then I couldn’t say another word, though I was thinking plenty of them, one-syllable words like good please again dick long hard. My bikini bra was history, and he was so happy with my breasts. “I knew they’d be even better than I remembered,” he said. “I am so…wow.” And while he was busy with those, he was working with the bikini bottom, which proved Sam could multitask. I was freeing him from the ancient cutoffs he’d been wearing, and they might have had a new hole or two by the time I finally skinned them down his legs and tossed them off the bed. “Can’t wait,” I said. “You ready?” He fumbled in his night table drawer. “I’ve been ready for years,” he told me, and he rolled on a condom and plunged in. Oh my God, it was so good. The years of experience of my vampire lovers might have made them skillful, but there is so much to say for sheer heartfelt enthusiasm; and the heat of Sam, the warmth of him, it was like the sun was soaking into my body. The tanning lotion and the sweat meant we slid against each other like seals, and it was wonderful all the way to the shuddering, straining climax. Would we have ended up making the best love ever if we both hadn’t been altered by the magic of the cluviel dor, if Sam had never died and I had never brought him back? I don’t know and I don’t care. The air conditioned cool of the trailer was heaven after the heat of our joining. I shivered with the cooling of my skin and the aftershocks of the explosion. “Don’t even think of asking if it was good for me,” I said in a limp voice, and he laughed breathlessly. “If I lie very still for about four hours, I might be ready to see if we could match the experience,” he said. “I can’t even think about that right now,” I said. “I feel like I just plowed the back forty with a team of mules.” “If that’s a euphemism, I can’t figure it out,” he said. The best I could manage was a feeble giggle. Sam rolled to his side to face me, and I mimicked his move. He put his arm around me. I could feel him get ready to say something at least three times, but every time he’d relax, as if he’d thought the better of it. “What do you want to tell me that’s taking you so long?” I asked. “I keep thinking of things to say and deciding not to,” Sam said. “Like, I hope we can do this again, and lots. Like, I hope this was something you wanted as much as I did. Like…I hope this is the beginning of something and not just…recreation. But you aren’t casual about who you decide to go to bed with.” I thought carefully before I spoke. “I wanted to do this a lot,” I said. “I’ve put you off forever, because I didn’t want to lose the good things I had in my job and your friendship. But I’ve always thought you’re wonderful, a great man.” I ran my thumbnail down his back, and he did a little shivering of his own. “Now I think you’re even greater.” I kissed his neck. “It’s awful soon after the ending of my relationship with Eric. For that reason, if no other, I’d like to take the heart-to-hearts slow. As we said when we first talked about this.” I could feel him smiling against my forehead. “Are you saying you want us to have wild, insane sex and not talk about a relationship? Are you aware that’s most guys’ dream?” “I’m real aware of that, believe me,” I said. “Telepath, remember? But I know there’s more to you than that, Sam. I’m giving you respect, and I’m giving myself some time to make sure I’m not rebounding.” “Speaking of rebounding…” Sam guided my hand down to his shaft, which was already well on its way to being up for activity. He didn’t need four hours after all. “I don’t know,” I said, considering. “This seems more like a ricochet.” “I’ll ricochet you,” he said, grinning. And he did.

I might have done an actual happy dance after I read this. But I was alone at the time so no one can prove it.

So there we have it! Their friendship DID move into ‘more’ territory just as I suspected it would. And she doesn’t seem to regret any of it happening. Given, she does ask for slow and sure, but that’s completely understandable. In a perfect world (a world with at least one more Sookie book) I don’t think she and Sam would have slept together so soon. I think she would have had her falling out with Eric and he would have left town, and Sam would still have confessed that he wanted to be with her. But I think the most that would have happened was he kissed her or something. Then, in the next book, after some time has passed, they would finally hook up. But with only one last book, Mrs. Harris just had to go with it. And it was still pretty awesome.

Sam had agreed to come line dancing with me tonight, which was a happy thing for many reasons. For one thing, I was excited about spending time with him now that we’d smashed down a huge barrier… And here’s my selfish confession: I was so happy, while I was soaking in the bathtub, that I almost resented having to worry about something, since I wanted to just roll in the pleasure of the moment. I reminded myself in severe terms that my previous lover had barely left town and that it was absurd for a grown woman to plunge into something else so quickly. And I’d told Sam we were going to go slow about making promises and commitments to each other. I meant those things. But that didn’t mean the physical release and the excitement of having great sex with Sam wasn’t completely satisfying.

Sam and I got there about ten minutes late because we’d been a little shy at meeting again after our amazing encounter, and he’d wanted to break the ice by making out a little. I’d had to remind him sternly that we were going out tonight, not staying in. “You were the one who said no love talk,” Sam said, his sharp teeth nipping my earlobe delightfully. “I’m willing to go there. Roses. Moonlight. Your lips.”

“You look real pretty,” he said… “Thanks, Sam.” We hadn’t seen each other (except at work) since the night at Stompin’ Sally’s. He’d given me the slow time I’d asked for. We had signed on to help JB and Tara in their little home-improvement plan, and we’d decided to go to a movie in Shreveport in a week or two on a night we both had off. I had my own ideas about how our relationship was going to progress, but I know that nothing it worse than assuming.

He came around to my side of the truck and helped me slide down in the high heels and snug dress. There might have been a bit more contact than strictly necessary. Even a lot more contact. “You have everything,” Sam said. “Everything.” His arms tightened around me. “I wish you’d reconsider, about me staying the night.” “I’m tempted,” I confessed. “But this time, we’re going to be slow and sure.” “I’m sure I want to get in bed with you.” He rested his forehead against mine. Then he laughed, just a little. “You’re right,” he said. “This is the best way to do it. Hard to be patient, though, when we know how good it can be.

Sam’s attitude about their relationship was a little surprising to me. In my head, he has been in love with Sookie forever. But in Dead Ever After he acts more like he’s wanted her for a while but not like he’s been helplessly in love. I actually like that he wasn’t moping off-page when she wasn’t around. It’s nice to see that he was struggling to figure out who he was and who he wanted to be (just as Sookie was) instead of just him having spent 8 years, or however long, in love with a girl who kept blowing him off. They were genuinely friends who were attracted to each other, who loved and cared for each other, and who, in the end, realized that what they both wanted was right in front of them.

It seems Sookie finally got her happily ever after, and I for one am tremendously thrilled. I wish we had got to see a little into the future, and we just might. October 29^th, After Dead.

I enjoyed my arms around him, the sense of him next to me. And if you were to ask me, I would confess that I thought Sam and I would be together, maybe by Christmas, maybe for always. I couldn’t imagine a future without him.

~Mallory 

I’ve also included a link to an article I read written by a like-minded Sookie fan. Check it out:

http://www.examiner.com/article/spoilers-dead-ever-after-brings-sookie-what-she-has-longed-for-her-entire-life