Mallory Reads "Definitely Dead"

Mallory Reads Definitely Dead

Book 6! After this I will be halfway done! Unfortunately, there are only 23 days until Dead Ever After comes out. Right now, I’m getting about one book a week done. In order to make the May 7^th deadline, I’ll need to finish a book every 3 days. Not to mention the short stories and novella. And a girl’s gotta have a life so you know. But I will finish, just maybe not on time.

Where last we left off, Eric’s most recent bartender tried to kill Sookie (and shot Sam), a less than half shifter injured and killed other Weres, Alcide’s dad was killed by Patrick Furnan in battle for packmaster, and Sookie met a were-tiger named Quinn who likes licking blood off of people. In Definitely Dead, Sookie gets her second official boyfriend. And I am not happy about it. Also, people try to kill her. Shocker, I know.

In Chapter 1, photo-shoots aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.

We begin with Sookie and Claude posing for photos for Claude’s portfolio. They are dressed like they’re going to be on the cover of a romance novel. The problem is, it is hard for either of them to look like they’re into it. Sookie tells Claude to picture Brad Pitt and when that doesn’t work, Edward James Olmos. Umm…

So Brad Pitt does nothing for the fairy but EJO does? To each their own, I guess. Claude manages a smolder but Sookie is still struggling. Part of it has to do with Claude being gay and her not being into him, but the other part is her inner turmoil.

Alfred Cumberland is photographing and Maria-Star Cooper, pack member, is assisting him. The Were wants to talk to Sookie about something, but can’t seem to spit it out. Sookie hears it though. Maria-Star is dating  Alcide.

Pain flickered through me like a knife, and then I locked it down and pulled my pride around me.

Maybe Sookie was holding out hope for Alcide after all. Or maybe she’s hurt because Alcide wants nothing to do with her and still blames her for his father’s death.

I might have had longings and hopes, but they’d never had a chance to ripen. The timing had always been wrong.

She wishes the two of them the best and tries to mean it.

When I hadn’t heard from Alcide in the weeks following his father’s death, I’d known that whatever feelings he’d had for me were quenched. That had been a blow, but not a fatal one. Realistically, I hadn’t expected anything more from Alcide. But gosh darn it, I liked him, and it always smarts when you find out you’ve been replaced with apparent ease. After all, before his dad’s death Alcide had suggested we live together. Now he was shacking up with this young Were, maybe planning to have puppies with her.

That is a good point. He was so eager for them to be together before, but now he’s so over it? I’m not so sure. I think when he’s over the worst of his shock and anger, he might just change his tune. I kinda feel for Maria-Star though. If I were her, I think I would be afraid Alcide was using me because he is grieving. But maybe not.

Sookie browses some of Alfred’s albums. He photographs the supernatural a lot. Well, somebody’s gotta do it. Then she and Claude resume the photo-shoot and get even more chummy. She’s supposed to wrap her leg up around him and look super excited, but she can’t seem to manage it. She decides she must do like Claude and imagine he is someone else.

Bill? No, she’s too angry with him right now. He’s still dating what’s-her-face. Eric? Nope, that’s dangerous. Plus she’s all worried about what he will do with her Debbie secret. Sam? Sadly no. Apparently, thinking about your boss naked is not a good idea. Alcide? Well, obviously that wouldn’t be a turn on right now. Then she thinks about Quinn and the leg licking.

That had been…unsettling. But even under the circumstances, it had made things deep inside me twitch. I remembered how Quinn’s bald head had moved while he cleaned my scrape in a very personal way, the firm grip his big warm fingers had had on me leg…

That seems to work out for her and Alfred gets his shots. He wants some bed shots but Sookie passes on that and suggests Claude do naked water shots instead. The fairy jumps at that idea. He thanks Sookie for her help (surprisingly). Before she leaves, Sookie hears in Maria-Star’s head that the Were wonders why Sookie passed on being with Alcide. Sookie deliberately, and un-wisely, asks if there has been any news on Debbie. Maria-Star says the detectives have given up on searching for her. Everyone thinks she killed herself when Alcide abjured her.

Also, the Pelts are pretty savage people, especially Sandra, the daughter. This seems like bad news.

That night at work, a couple of priests come into the bar. Also Bill. He kisses Sookie on the cheek (she should not allow this!) and sits as his table.

Bill was by himself, which was a nice change. Usually, he brought the lovely Selah Pumphrey. I loathed her. Since Bill had been my first love and my first lover, maybe I would never be completely over him. Maybe he didn’t want me to be. He did seem to drag Selah into Merlotte’s every single date they had. I figured he was waving her in my face. Not exactly what you did if you didn’t care anymore, huh?

Ugh. I’m so tired of Bill.

She takes him his blood and he wants to talk. How has she been? When is she going to New Orleans?  She plans to go in the next month to go through Hadley’s stuff. He wants to go with her. NO! She’ll let him know though. It hurts to be around him but he wouldn’t hurt her. Well… unless he gets really hungry. Think about that, Sookie!

The two priests call her over and ask why she was talking to the imp of hell for so long. LOL. She doesn’t think that’s funny though and gets all defensive. Then she explains how they dated for a while and that Bill is nothing like an imp. Yeah, okay, whatever. I guess I give her props for defending vampires in general. Before they leave, one of them asks Sookie for a word. He has been contacted by the Pelts contacted him. They want his help in speaking with everyone who saw Debbie before she disappeared. Sookie refuses. She’s told all she knows (or is going to tell).

The priest leaves unhappy and Sookie just doesn’t give a flitter.

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In Chapter 2, Sookie is too trustworthy.

The next night at work, Sookie receives a surprise guest. Mr. Purple-eyed Were-tiger. Sam gets tense and wonders what Quinn is doing there. He’s also surprised to find out Sookie knows the large man. She tells him how they met at the packmaster ceremony. He’s unhappy that she left Quinn out of her retelling of the events from that night (she’d told him not long after about what went down).

Quinn is sniffing the air… trailing someone. Sookie.

Okay, mixed feelings on that. I glanced sideways at Sam to get his reaction. I had trusted him for five years now, and he had never failed me. Now Sam nodded at me. He didn’t look happy though. “Go see what he wants,” he said, his voice so low it was almost a growl.

There must be something up with Quinn. But what? Sookie walks over to him and gets all flustered for some reason. (Let me just tell you straight up. I don’t like Quinn so don’t expect me to ever be excited to see him.) He smells her again when she’s closer and tells her he could recognize her in a dark room. Yeah weird. But she gets all shy and says thanks, she guesses. Compliment?

Intended as one. Who’s the dog behind the bar who’s giving me the stay-away look?” He meant dog as a statement of fact, not as a derogatory term. “That’s my boss, Sam Merlotte.” “He has an interest in you.” “I should hope so. I’ve worked for him for round about five years.” “Hmm…”

Oh, poor naive Sookie. It’s more than that and you know it!

Quinn orders a beer and she goes to fetch it. Sam wants to know what’s up. She plays dumb and then shrugs, which ticks him off apparently. Sam slams the glass of beer on the counter and she gives him a dirty look.

She does ask him why he’s in the area and he says looking for her. Creeper. She asks if he’s there for business or personal. He says both. Great. Just great. He hangs out like all night and then when they’re closing up, tells Sookie he’ll meet her at her house if that is agreeable. Um no? She doesn’t even know you! He does say he can meet her somewhere else if that makes her nervous but he really wants to talk to her tonight. Why he can’t just talk to her at the bar is beyond me. Arlene and Danielle were not-so-sneakily checking him out, while Sam just ignores him.

Sookie checks his mind and decides that he means her no harm so why not let him back to her house? Not wise, in my opinion, but I’m not the one who gets beat up all the time. She finishes cleaning up and leaves, three people giving her disapproving looks. Four if you count me. Quinn has a really fancy truck. Good for him. :/

She leads him into the unfinished kitchen and informs him how her house burnt and they’re not done fixing it yet. Although, they got a lot further than I thought they would’ve since it’s only been like 3 weeks since the last book instead of 8 or however many the contractor said it would take for her house to be livable. They go in the living room and sit. He says he’s wanted to see her again since they met in Shreveport.

Then he brings up her dating Alcide and she says she hasn’t seen him since then either. So she’s unattached? No toes to step on? Well, some exes but that doesn’t bother him. So he asks her on a date. He seems sincere so she says yes. Boo.

Now for business. The Queen of Louisiana has requested Sookie’s service for the upcoming vampire summit. The one Eric made mention of before. But the Queen outranks Eric so Sookie will have to inform the vampire she can’t do his bidding. She does not want to have to do that.

Quinn decides to change the subject back to their date. What should they do? Move? Dinner? Hockey? Cook at home? No way. Too cozy. A play? Yes, a play sounds fun, she says. They plan to go Friday night since she’s off work. She offers to pay and doesn’t like it when she “hears” his surprise and how he thinks that’s sweet, but no.

She asks where he lives and he says Memphis. He’s a partner for a business called Special Events. They travel around and plan/manage supernatural events (like packmaster ceremonies or vampire weddings- the kings and queens will marry each other sometimes). While he’s in the area, he lives in the guest house of a shifter in Shreveport.

He likes talking about his job with her since most of the time he has to lie to girls about what he actually does for a living. She likes not having to keep secrets, too. Not that she had to keep any form her former love interests either. So lucky they found each other, Quinn says. Yeah…right. He stands up and pulls her to her feet, keeping hold of her hand.

When he kissed me good night, his lips brushed my cheek, and I smiled. I like a man who knows when to rush things…and when not to.

I may as well brace myself for what is to come. Sigh.

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In Chapter 3, Eric is not going to be happy.

Pam calls Sookie the next night she’s at work. Eric has summoned her to Fantasia with no explanation.

“I’m not giving up work or free time to drive over to Shreveport because Mr. High and Mighty wants me to jump to do his bidding,” I protested—reasonably, I thought. “He can haul his ass over here if he wants to tell me something. Or he can pick up the telephone his ownself.” So there.

So there indeed. Sookie is not a minion or an employee of the vampires. She shouldn’t have to go just because they call her. Pam says just be there Friday night but Sookie can’t. She has a date. Even though I’m not on board with her date, it still gives me a little pleasure that Eric won’t like it either. I want him to be jealous. I’m not sure what that says about me. Pam finds this information amusing and can’t wait to tell Eric.

Sookie starts to regret telling the vampire about her date. She fears what Eric might do when he finds out. She says to tell him thanks for the calendar proofs. Remember his nude calendar idea? Yeah that one. I wouldn’t mind looking at those proofs… Pam reveals they plan to do a calendar for men too with the women employees. She wonders if Sookie would like her proofs as well. LOL. Sookie politely declines.

Pam wonders what to tell Eric and Sookie says to just tell him the truth. He won’t be happy, Pam says. Well, that is his problem, Sookie replies. Though she fears it might be her problem too sooner or later. Since he now knows about Debbie, he has something to hold over her head. She wonders if he would ever use that information to his advantage. I hope he doesn’t. I feel like Eric is the character to somewhat reform himself in this series. He needs to keep making progress toward becoming more like no memory Eric from Dead to the World.

Back to work. Andy and Halleigh come into the bar that night and Andy asks Sookie for a favor. He wants her to hide a ring box in Halleigh’s fries. He’s going to propose. He also gives her a tip for doing so. She tries not to listen in after carrying Halleigh her food but can’t help it. I’d want to know what the woman thought, too. At first Halleigh thinks the box was an accident, and then she realizes what it is. She is happy and troubled. But she agrees to marry him on one condition: they have to have a house of their own. She doesn’t want to live with his grandmother. Seems reasonable.

Andy finds Sookie later and wants to know if Halleigh really loves him. She replies that Halleigh loves him as much as he loves her. And leaves him to stew on that idea.

In other news, Merlotte’s has a new cook. I hope Sam ran a background check on this one. Supernaturally and otherwise. Her name is Callie Collins.

Callie was heavy, so heavy I didn’t know how she could get through the hours she spent standing on her feet in the hot kitchen.

She’s also not very pleasant. But so far, not murderous so that’s a plus.

That night at home, Sookie is alone and washing dishes. Looking out the window, she thinks she sees something at the edge of the woods. With her spidey senses, she detects some brain activity. Can’t be Bill. LOL. But really, it can’t. Or Eric. She considers calling Bill to see if he’ll come check it out but doesn’t want him to think she is just a damsel in distress who needs him to save her. Good thinking…maybe.

She makes sure all the doors are locked and then stretches out her mind but doesn’t hear anything else. She knows if it was a Were or other shifter, they could break in if they wanted to, no problem. But there doesn’t seem to be any more signs of anyone so she finishes the dishes and heads to bed.

Why do I have a feeling the person creeping in the woods was not there for innocent purposes. Could it have been the new and mysterious Quinn? We shall see.

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In Chapter 4, weddings!

Sookie calls Jason the next morning and he seems stressed. Something is up. He says he will come to her house later. In the meanwhile, she decides to run to the store.  She’s driving in the car, enjoying life.

Though, I was having a blissful moment of being happy and content, I had one of those stray ideas you get at odd moments. I thought, How nice it would be if Eric were here with me in the car. He’d look so good with the wind blowing his hair, and he’d enjoy the moment. Well, yeah, before he burned to a crisp. But I realized I’d thought of Eric because it was the kind of day you wanted to share with the person you cared about, the person whose company you enjoyed the most. And that would be Eric as he’d been while he was cursed by a witch: the Eric who hadn’t been hardened by centuries of vampire politics, the Eric who had no contempt for humans and their affairs, the Eric who was not in charge of many financial enterprises and responsible for the lives and incomes of quite a few humans and vampires. In other words, Eric as he would never be again.

I knew her spending time with him would be a bad thing. That Eric was great. But he’s gone now. The only hope is that the real Eric will soften a little. But even if he does, he will never be like no-memory Eric. Her bad mood soured, Sookie decides she needs a pick-me-up. She goes to Tara’s Togs to get a new outfit for her date.

We find out that Tara sent Sookie the title for the Malibu she’d lent her with a note saying the car is hers. Sookie tried to give it back but Tara wouldn’t let her. She thinks it is Tara’s way of repaying her for helping get rid of Mickey. But Sookie still isn’t sure that their friendship is solid and wishes for that more than the car. Portia is in the shop, looking at wedding stuff. Tara is a representative of Isabelle’s Bridal and carries their catalogs and samples of dresses.

Portia says they will need 400 invitations. Also, obviously she and Halleigh want to wear different dresses but maybe the same bridesmaid’s dresses. Wait what? Sookie seems shocked by this, too. Portia is getting married? She and Halleigh have 5 bridesmaids a piece. Tara lets Portia take the catalog to show the other bride.

On the way out, Portia tells Sookie that she is indeed getting married. She is having a double wedding with Andy and Halleigh. Okay, so maybe it’s just me, but I feel like this is weird. Double weddings in general are, but especially one with your brother. Also the wedding is in April, so not that far away. Sookie wonders what the rush is.

Oooo…maybe Portia was pregnant. But if she was in the family way, she wasn’t thinking about it, and I hardly thought she would be doing otherwise. Gosh, if I ever found out I was pregnant, I’d be so happy! If the guy loved me and would marry me, that is—because I wasn’t tough enough to raise a kid by myself, and my grandmother would roll over in her grave if I was an unmarried mother.

Sookie wants babies! Well, she ain’t gonna get those with a vampire. Or Alcide possibly. (I‘m not gonna forget he didn’t want kids.)

Portia tells Sookie to keep the date open and at first Sookie is shocked, but then Portia says she’s hired Sam to bartend. She only wants Sookie to come to help him. The wedding will be a nighttime wedding because Portia’s fiancé, Glen Vicks, has some clients that couldn’t make it to a daytime wedding. Vampires. Sookie takes a chance and tells Portia she should invite Bill. The Bellefleurs still don’t know Bill is their ancestor. He should really tell him that. They might not hate him as much. Portia seems appalled at the idea and wonders why since she and Bill are no longer together. Sookie opts not to tell her anything more.

Portia leaves and Tara helps Sookie pick out an outfit. Everything is fine between them and I am glad.

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In Chapter 5, and more bad stuff.

Jason arrives just after noon and seems grim. He picks at his food, which is so not like him. Since he is now part shifter, Sookie can’t read his mind as easily as she used to. Then he starts talking. Crystal doesn’t want him to tell anyone, but he has to, he says. She had a miscarriage, and she won’t go to the doctor. Jason said she’s losing blood and can hardly even stand up. She doesn’t want Calvin or anyone else in Hotshot to know either.

He thought maybe Sookie could help. He asks about the doctor that helped her when the maenad attacked her that time. Dr. Ludwig. Sookie manages to find the doctor in the phonebook and calls her. There is a long message about how the doctor doesn’t take new patients, doesn’t need insurance, and isn’t looking to donate to charity. After another moment, the doctor answers.

Sookie lets the doctor know who she is and what the problem is. The doctor doesn’t seem thrilled, but agrees to come check Crystal out. She will meet at Sookie’s and follow them to Jason’s. She arrives a little while later, driven by Amanda the Were. Usually her son drives the doctor, but he’s in school. Sookie lets her know that Jason will show them the way because she has to work. Amanda, perhaps not entirely intentionally, makes her feel guilty for not rushing to Crystal’s side herself. Don’t feel guilty, Sookie. She and Crystal don’t like each other and she already did a good thing by calling the doctor. There is nothing she could do at Crystal’s side but comfort her, and I bet Crystal doesn’t want that so… she may as well just go to work.

She gets to work and the day gets worse. Sam calls her into his office. The Pelt’s are in there with the priest. Apparently, they showed up and insisted.

The older Pelts were tall and slim. He wore glasses and was balding, with ears that stuck out of his head like jug handles. She was attractive, if a bit overly made up. She was wearing a Donna Karan pants set and carrying a bag with a famous logo on it. Heels, too. Sandra Pelt was more casual, her jeans and T-shirt fitting her narrow figure very tightly.

They seem desperate. She discovers Sandra is a shifter as well, which shouldn’t be possible since she is the second child. But, Sookie discovers from their minds, Sandra and Debbie were both adopted because their parents couldn’t have children of their own.

She apologizes to them for their loss but tells them the same thing she told the priest earlier. Barbra Pelt starts to cry. Debbie had said Debbie thought Sookie was stealing Alcide. But Debbie was engaged, Sookie reminds them, and Alcide was free to date whoever he wanted. Sandra is not happy with her answer. But Sookie has already talked to the police and the private detectives. There’s nothing else to tell.

Sam’s phone rings while Sookie is telling the Pelts all of this and he runs out of the room. What goes on? She finally excuses herself from the office and heads out into the bar. She asks Sam what happened. The elementary school called. Holly’s son Cody is missing. Danielle’s mom went to pick him and Danielle’s daughter up. He ran back inside to get something and never came back out. No one at the school knows what happened to him.

Holly called her ex and he is on the way, but doesn’t seem to know anything about it. I.E.: he didn’t pick the boy up. The police have gone to the school to search but so far nothing. Sookie knows that she can use her ability to help.

I looked at Sam, and he looked back at me sadly. “It’s hard, isn’t it cher?” he said. “What are you going to do?” “Whatever I have to. But I have to do it now,” I said. He nodded. “Go on down to the school,” he said, and I left.

Aw, I hope they find the little boy.

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In Chapter 6, good deed for the day.

Sookie heads down to the school to help the police find the missing Cody. Bud is not happy to see her but Andy is. He motions for her to take a look around. She walks around the school to the playground and back, not finding anything. Andy says everyone is inside the cafeteria. He wants her to go stand behind the curtain in there and get to reading people.

There are a few teachers and some of their own kids, Halleigh, Mrs. Garfield (principal) and Miss Maddy (custodian). Most of them are thinking they are glad it isn’t their own kids missing. Halleigh is distraught because she’s the one who let Cody go back into the school. She also learns some personal details about some teachers, but all of it seems to be irrelevant. Until…

Kenya comes back behind the curtain to check on Sookie and she tells the police woman to check inside Miss Maddy’s trash can. Sure enough, the boy is inside, hurt but still alive. Apparently, Maddy was mopping when Cody ran back into the school. She yelled at him for getting the floors dirty, which scared the boy who then fell and hit his head. He was unconscious and Maddy thought he was dead. So logically she put him in the trashcan to hide him for the time being.

Sookie tells Andy he better not ever ask for her help again. But he’s already thinking of how many cases she could help him solve. Kevin, skinny little Kevin, comes to her defense.

“She’s not a Magic 8 Ball,” Kevin said.

Everyone is surprised by the outburst but he gets his point across. Sookie leaves before Andy can say much more and goes back to work. Holly and Danielle were gone to check on Cody which left Sookie as the only waitress. But Sam has called Tanya Grissom to fill in. Tanya is a college graduate move-in who had put in an application at the bar. Tanya is also a shape-shifter. She wonders if Sam tried Arlene and Charlsie first (instead of giving a shifter the work instead) but he did. Arlene had a date (surprise surprise) and Charlsie was babysitting. Also Charlsie probably won’t be working much longer.

Sookie doesn’t like the idea of having to get used to another waitress, but in the five years she’s worked at Merlotte’s, many have come and gone.

I’d had a couple of jobs before I’d starting working for Sam. He was the easiest person to work for, by far. He’d become more than my employer somewhere along the way; he was my friend . When I’d found out he was a shape-shifter, it hadn’t bothered me a bit. I’d heard rumors in the shifting community that the Weres were thinking of going public, the way the vampires had. I worried about Sam.

Me too. Nothing bad better happen to him. 

Acting on impulse—and I can only suppose the tidal wave of emotion I’d experienced that day had something to do with this—I threw my arms around Sam and gave him a hug. I smelled clean skin and hair and the slight sweet smell of a light aftershave, an undertone of win, a whiff of beer…the Sam smell. I drew it into my lungs like oxygen. Surprised, Sam hugged me back, and for a second the warmth of his embrace made me feel almost light-headed with pleasure.

Well, you could have that all the time, you know.

Then we both back off, because after all, this was our workplace and there were a few customers scattered around. Tanya came in, so it was good we were out of the clinch. I didn’t want her to think this was routine.

Doesn’t want her to think Sookie and Sam hug all the time? Or doesn’t want her to think she can hug Sam all the time?

Tanya was shorter than my five foot six, and she was a pleasant-looking woman in her late twenties. Her hair was short and straight and shiny, a medium brown that almost matched her eyes. She had a small mouth and a button nose and a nice figure. I had absolutely no reason to dislike her, but I wasn’t happy to see her.

Tanya smiles at the two of them, a perky smile and gets to work. Sam can tell Sookie is unhappy and wants to know if there is something wrong with the new waitress. Not that she can tell…so far. Tanya turns to look at Sookie, smile gone. They look at each other for a moment before Tanya smiles again she goes back to taking orders.

Suddenly I thought, I wonder if Tanya is interested in Sam. I didn’t like the way I felt when I thought about that.

How did you feel? Upset? Angry? Jealous? *evil smile* Hey, one can hope!

She manages to make it through her shift and heads home. There is a truck parked out front. It’s Calvin Norris. Crystal called him and told him what happened. He wanted to thank Sookie for helping his niece. It happens a lot, he says. That’s why he wants to mate with Sookie. She feels a little guilty for disappointing him on that front. He just seems so sad, I think is why she feels that way. Even though the thought of it weirds her out.

He says he reckons Jason and Crystal will get married. He’s not crazy about Jason and Sookie says she’s not crazy about Crystal either but it’s not their lives. So why does Jason have to marry her? She’s not pregnant and I can’t imagine he’s fallen deeply in love with her. Calvin also wants to know what Sookie heard at his house (when she brought him the food after he got home from the hospital) that turned her off of him. Honestly, Cal, I’m not sure she was ever ‘on’ you.

But she says she heard Terry was his daughter. Then we learn something we didn’t know. Or at least, I didn’t think about it. Full blooded shifters can mate with each other and the pairing only produces one shifter, right? Then the rest of their offspring will be regular humans who heal fast and stuff. Okay, but… if two full blooded shifters mate with two other full blooded shifters, they can produce another shifter. So it’s not like one shifter per person, it’s one per couple. Hotshot residence have been switching out spouses, in a sense, to produce more panthers. Gross indeed. This is why some of the newer panthers have trouble even changing. Too much inbreeding.

This switching thing also makes sense when you think about Patrick Furnan and the werewolf ceremony. He was supposed to contribute to the pack. He couldn’t have anymore Weres with his wife, but he could with someone else. This puts an unsettling thought in Sookie’s mind. Do all shifters do this? Yes, when their pack starts to dwindle.

She wonders why Calvin picked her to mate with and he says cause she’s pretty and nice and hardworking. Plus she has no man to take care of her. She still isn’t biting and he wonders if he ever had a chance with her. She gently lets him down.

I believed that marked the end of this courtship. I had never been deeply attracted to Calvin Norris, and I’d never seriously thought about accepting his offer. But I’d be less than honest if I didn’t admit that I’d fantasized about a steady husband with a good job and benefits who came straight home after his shift and fixed broken things on his days off.

I fantasize about that, as well. Where is my hard working man? Though if he’s a Calvin, no thanks.

I’m afraid that what really struck me about Calvin’s confession—or explanation—is what it might reveal to me about Alcide. Alcide had sparked my affection, and my lust. Thinking of him did make me wonder what marriage to him would be like, wonder in a very personal way, as opposed to my impersonal speculation about health insurance that Calvin had inspired. I’d pretty much abandoned the secret hope Alcide had inspired in me, after I’d been forced to shoot his former fiancé; but something in me had clung to the thought, something I’d kept secret even from myself, even after I’d found out he was dating Maria-Star. As recently as this day, I’d been stoutly denying to the Pelts that Alcide had any interest in me. But something lonely inside me had nursed a hope.

A hope for that happily ever after they talked about in Club Dead? Yeah I have, too, kind of. Ultimately, I’m still Team Sam, but Alcide is mostly a good dude. And he could give Sookie a relatively normal life. I’m sure he has health insurance. But I just don’t know if it will ever work out for them.

Sookie sheds some tears over this recent information and I feel for her. Also, I wonder if regular shape-shifters do that multi-mating thing? Probably not since they don’t really have packs and don’t organize. I might be tempted to ask Sam about this.

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In Chapter 7, date night.

No more moping. It’s Friday which means Sookie’s date is tonight. She spends the morning laying out in the sun, painting her nails and enjoying alone time. Afterwards, she runs into town and buys groceries and a new bra and panties. (I hope she doesn’t end up showing those off tonight.) She also found, upon checking the mail, that she’d gotten an invite to Halleigh’s wedding shower, so she picks up a gift for the girl.

She eats lunch, cleans the refrigerator out, washes clothes and changes the sheets, though she says she has no intention of going to bed with Quinn. (Stick to that!) She showers and gets ready. A knock at the door fifteen minutes early confuses her (she heard no truck pull up). But it is not Quinn at the door, but Eric. He wants to come in but she says no. She has plans. He is not happy for several reasons. Since Sookie told Pam Eric could just come talk to her himself, he has. He wants to know who she’s going out with but she tells him that is not his business.

He insists it is because she should be his. They slept together, he’s cared for her and given her money. To which she replies, yeah but not recently, he’s not showing it well, and she earned that money! Then he pulls the ‘I am sheriff’ card.  But he doesn’t tell her what to do! He seethes. She will accompany him to the vampire conference. Yeah, no.

Quinn pulls up then (wearing a grey suit, purple shirt and a gold hoop earring. Umm pirate much?)

I would never have believed that in Eric’s presence I could think another man attractive. I’d have been wrong to think so.   

Yeah, I still don’t get it. But anyway… Eric and Quinn know each other. Quinn explains that the Queen has requested Sookie’s help at the vampire summit so Eric is outranked. Why would the Queen give orders through a shifter? Eric wonders. Well, that shifter has performed a “valuable service” for her. That’s not comforting. Eric is super pissed.

“This woman has been mine, and she will be mine,” he said, in tones so definite I thought about checking my rear for a brand. Quinn shifted his gaze to me.  “Babe, are you his, or not?” “Not,” I said.

And they leave Eric stewing in his own juices. I’m not sure how I feel about this. First time around reading the books, I was more Team Eric, so I was probably furious here as well. Now though, I kinda feel a little satisfaction in her leaving him standing there like that. He needs to learn that she does not belong to him. Vampires are possessive in most vampire literature and I don’t dig possessive. (This is why I did not like Christian Grey at all. Still don’t.)

On the way to the show, they talk about things they enjoy, like dancing. Quinn is also into sports. They arrive and head in (people keep staring at them), watch the Producers, which they both seem to find enjoyable and he gives some appropriate compliments and then asks if she wants to grab dinner. She has a mini internal debate about work the next day but how she’s really having a good time and decides on yes. She wants to pay though and he refuses that.

Here we go again. He insists that since he asked her on the date, he should pay for everything. She wonders what he would say if she asked him on a date then? He seems reluctant but says he would have to let her pay if she wanted. I think it’s nice when men pay. But, at the same time, I feel bad making them pay all the time. Especially if you go out a lot. Unless they’re rich. But then they might be snobs and I wouldn’t want to date them anyway. But I digress.

They reach the car and Sookie senses that something is wrong. But before Quinn can get a good look around, they are attacked from behind. What? Always getting attacked! Who put a supernatural target on Sookie’s head? This is all Bill’s fault! Somehow…

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In Chapter 8, must there be injuries?

Sookie and Quinn’s attackers are Weres. Teenage half Weres who were recently bitten. Also, they might be on drugs. One jumps Quinn while the other tackles Sookie to the ground and starts trying to choke her. Quinn throws off one Were and grabs a hold of the other, who does not let go of Sookie but drags her up with him. He finally manages to get the Were to let go and throws him on the pavement.

Poor Sookie sis gasping for breath and Quinn decides he will kill them if they hurt her. How nice. Though not the first time someone has offered to kill for Sookie. A cops comes up and is calling for an ambulance. There were quite a few witnesses to the incident. He asks if Quinn was the one who “saved” her. Another officer, who had been examining the assailants, comes over and says one has a dislocated shoulder and the other a broken leg. Sookie and Quinn both explain that they have never seen the two before.

Sookie wonders how her new outfit fared. No tears, but a few rough places where is scraped the pavement. She tears up, unable to help it. Well, she was just attacked and nearly strangled so… Quinn hugs her to him until she stops crying. He vows to find out who hired them. Sookie knows they were the targets because she picked it from the Weres’ brains. Her throat hurts but nothings broken and she doesn’t have money for the doctor.

“Then we won’t go.” He bent and kissed my cheek. I turned my face up to him, and his next kiss landed in exactly the right spot. After a gentle second, it flared into something more intense. We were both feeling the aftermath of the adrenalin rush.

Officer Boling clears his throat and they stop that nonsense.

I knew I couldn’t move away for a minute or two, since his excitement was pressed right up against me. Though these weren’t the best circumstances for evaluation, I was pretty sure Quinn was proportional.

Good to know. Also she’s feeling frisky apparently. Getting attacked accelerates you to a fourth date status. Uh-oh. Perhaps it’s a good thing she washed those sheets. The policeman wants them to go down to the station to answer a few questions. Detective Coughlin will conduct the interviews.  Sookie tells Quinn when they are alone that if he thinks something at her she can hear it. Then he starts thinking about being in bed with her. She laughs. But then he thinks that they have somewhere else they need to go after this. But this has nothing to do with hanky panky.

Detective Coughlin, as it turns out, is the same detective who interviewed Sookie and Alcide after they found the body at the bridal shop. He asks about Alcide. (We also found out what they did with Jackson’s body. They put him half in a feed tank full of water. He fell in and broke his leg when he hit the bottom. He tried to get out but couldn’t and some wild animals chewed on him.) Sookie tells the detective she hasn’t seen Alcide since his dad died.

He leads them into another room and spots a face she recognizes. A blonde man, a Were. Patrick’s second. He spots her and she knows he still hates her. She asks Coughlin his name.

“Why, you going after him next? You can’t seem to settle on one man, can you, Miss Stackhouse?”

Not a very nice thing to say. Though Sookie did claim to be engaged to Alcide not too long ago.

“It’s more like they can’t settle on me, Detective Coughlin,” I said.

I bet Sam would settle on you.

Anywho the dudes name is Cal Myers. Coughlin asks basic questions and then tells her she will have to come back to testify against the two boys. Before she leaves, she warns him to be wary of his new partner. She sees in Coughlin’s head that he takes that warning seriously. He already suspects something is up with his partner.

When they get back to their car, Quinn informs Sookie they are going to Hair of the Dog. Isn’t that a werewolf bar? Oh geez.

------------------------------

In Chapter 9, down boy.

They arrive at the bar and it doesn’t take Sookie long to discover that she is not welcome. The closer they get to the front door, the greater her urge to turn around. The place is spelled it seems. A do not enter for humans. Eventually, she can’t move forward anymore and Quinn, who forgot she was human or something stupid, picks her up and carries her in.

Immediately after entering she is faced with more hostility. A young Were with a lacking fashion sense comes at her. Not allowed here!, she says. Sookie smiles at her and the Were goes to punch her. But Quinn gets all growly and the bartender pulls out a shotgun. After a moment, things relax. Then someone calls to Sookie. It’s Amanda, the doctor driving Were. She’s sitting at a table with three other people. Some husky man, Maria-Star and Alcide.

Well, awkward. Amanda, who apparently owns the bar, is happy to see Quinn there. It’s an honor or something. Who is this guy? Quinn informs her about the attack. Weres. This gets the attention of everyone in the bar. Long Tooth? Unknown, but he tells them the two were recently bitten and on drugs. Alcide asks Sookie if she was hurt and she shows him the bruises. She pulls her “friend of the pack” card, saying she didn’t think she’d be in trouble with Weres in Shreveport.

Quinn explains that the two are in jail but doesn’t mention Cal. The pack should already know he’s a cop though, right?

Alcide says Quinn should get Sookie home and the tiger puts his arm around her. They will leave once the pack has assured them they will find out why the attack happened. Amanda says they will tell Patrick, who will investigate. Why do I have a feeling he might not? Maybe he was even responsible. I wouldn’t put it past him.

They leave and then…

Moving quicker than I could track, I was against the car and his mouth was on mine. After a startled second, I was right in the moment. Shared danger does that, and it was the second time—on our first date—that we’d been in peril. Was that a bad omen?

Yes, you should stop this now!

I dismissed that rational thought when Quinn’s lips and teeth traveled down to find that vulnerable and sensitive place where the neck curves into the shoulder. I made an incoherent noise, because along with the arousal I always felt when kissed there, I felt undeniable pain from the bruises that circled my neck. It was an uncomfortable combination.

He apologizes but doesn’t stop there. Oh no. She contemplates touching him…you know…but thinks better of that. But she moves against him and then he’s all touchy feelying her chest. Then she comes to her senses and says they should stop. But he licks her ear. No, she says. No sex in a parking lot. Not even a little bit of sex? He wonders. (Who is he, 50 Cent?) What constitutes a little bit of sex anyway? Oral maybe? I don’t know. Either way the answer is NO! But he keeps kissing her cause her body is speaking to him. One last time, No!

So finally he stops. Sorry I just tried to sex you up in a nasty parking lot. My bad. She says she likes him, really she does, but she’s had some bad experiences with moving too fast. Like with no memory Eric? Probably. Then she realizes she’s started her period. Great way to top off a crappy evening. Well, I suppose it wasn’t all crappy. The play was fun till they got attacked.

They head home discussing who was the target of the attack. Sookie thinks they both were. But they still don’t know who hired the Weres. Or who bit them in the first place. (Money’s on Patrick) Sookie says they could try to make them talk but Quinn doesn’t seem to think they will survive the night in jail. I wonder if this is because he thinks the Long Tooth Weres will take them out or if whoever hired them will, since they failed at their mission. Either way, it’s a little depressing to think about.

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In Chapter 10, uber grossness.

Turns out the two were killed in jail by an unknown assailant. They were strangled. I wonder if that is significant. The two had had trouble with police before, the news article said. Coughlin and Cal are working the case. Yeah, I bet that’s gonna get solved. Cal most likely made the evidence disappear.

Sookie gets to work and discovers she is working with Tanya. Sam keeps talking about how she’s a great waitress and Sookie tells him she’s tired of hearing about it. Sam wants to know why she doesn’t like the other woman. No good reason, Sam. Sometimes we (women) just don’t like people. No reason necessary. Though Sookie has a slight reason. She doesn’t trust her and can’t read her mind well to find out if she’s up to no good. Sam also has made no mention of her shifter status. Odd.

Bill and Selah come in and Sookie stops herself from taking their order even though they are in her section. She doesn’t want to deal with them so Arlene handles their table. She then deliberately listens to Selah’s thoughts: why does Bill always want to come here? Why did he ever date a barmaid whose grandmother was murdered? How tacky is that?

How insensitive is that, Selah?  You can date Bill all day but don’t insult Sookie just because you’re insecure. Biotch. Sookie tries not to take it personally but she is in a really bad mood. She slams beers on the table in front of Catfish and Hoyt and Catfish wonders if it is her time of the month. It is, as we know. She thinks that might help explain her bad mood. Then… ew.

I glanced over at Bill and caught him staring at me, his nostrils flaring. He could smell the blood. A wave of acute embarrassment rolled over me, turning my face red. For a second, I glimpsed naked hunger on his face, and then he wiped his features clean of all expression.

Warning for female talk.

Here is my position on this. The thought of vampires drinking period blood is disgusting. For one thing, it’s not even just blood. It’s waste from our bodies. Maybe it would smell the same as blood from a vein to a vampire, but the thought of them wanting to consume it makes me want to gag. I don’t appreciate the bloody tampon vampire jokes. Sick. I can handle a lot but this is over the line. (It should also be pointed out that I think the scene from 50 Shades where they have period sex and he’s all “covered in her blood” is also uber disgusting.) Men, vampire or otherwise should cool their jets that time of the month. Maybe some women are okay with this. I am not one of them.

Okay, done.

If he wasn’t weeping with unrequited love on my doorstep, at least he was suffering a little. A tiny pleased smile was on my lips when I glimpsed myself in the mirror behind the bar.

Unrequited huh? Are we over Bill? One can only hope.

Later in the evening, another vampire comes into the bar. She wants to talk to Sookie. Of course she does. She is tall with golden skin and long dark hair. Her name is Felicia. Pam sent her. Then LOL. She is the new bartender at Fangtasia and Pam told her to come meet Sookie because Sookie keeps killing the bartenders. Felicia doesn’t seem to understand that was a joke on Pam’s part. Sookie also thinks Pam was trying to stir up trouble by sending the new beautiful bartender. Eric would have noticed her looks, of course. But turns out that wouldn’t matter cause she’s a lesbian. 

Sookie asks how she ended up in Shreveport. Her friend Indira invited her. And she heard Eric was a really great boss. He doesn’t make his minions sleep with him. Well, how nice. Plus he only makes them sit at the bar a few times a month. She moved from Arkansas. The king, Peter Threadgill, has just married Sophie-Anne Leclerq, queen of Louisiana. I’m not sure if we knew her name before or not, but if not, there you go.

According to Felicia, Peter hold grudges and is never happy with anything. He wants something so bad, but then when he gets it, it’s not enough. For example, he wanted an alliance with Sophie-Anne (this might be the marriage thing…not too sure…). He got it. But then he wanted more. He wanted her to love him. He’s visiting her now. That seems significant somehow.

Felicia tells Sookie she’s glad they met so now Sookie can’t sneak up and kill her. LOL. After she leaves, Arlene and Sam want to know what’s up. She explains and then Arlene gets all weird, telling Sookie to shun the dead and stuff. Then she says she’s been going to this new church with her boyfriend Ralph Prudhomme. A Fellowship church. Uh-oh. She’s also seen the priests there.

Sookie and Sam are both troubled by this news. She did not make any friends the last time she visited the Fellowship, and wonders if Steve and Sarah Newlin might still want revenge for her part in the collapse of their Dallas church. They’ve seen her multiple times and she figures sooner or later they will find out who she is and where she lives. Great. Just great.

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In Chapter 11, demons!

Tanya shows up at Sookie’s house the next morning and our girl is not happy to see her. Sookie doesn’t even attempt to be nice to the girl and refuses to give her any coffee. No wonder Bill is with someone else, Tanya says. Low blow. She tries to apologize but Sookie’s having none of that. So Tanya leaves without explaining why she was there. Sookie is very suspicious of her.

Quinn calls and says he’s in Dallas. One of his employees disappeared and he’s helping look for clues as to his whereabouts. He’s heading back tomorrow. He wants to have dinner. Maybe at her place? Steaks on the grill? Not gonna lie, that does sound good. I bet he likes his rare. Dinner plans made. He’ll see her at six.

But as she is getting ready to go grocery shopping, a limo pulls up in her driveway. Mr. Cataliades: bearer of bad news. He asks if she is packed and ready. Wait, ready for what? She doesn’t seem to know either. To go to New Orleans, he says. Huh? Did she not get his message? That would be a no. Apparently, he sent a magically sealed letter to her a few nights before. It was supposed to be delivered by Gladiola, whoever that is.

Sookie realizes the night she was supposed to receive the letter was the night she heard noises coming from outside of her house. But she never saw anyone. Mr. Cataliades motions towards the car and a women gets out.

She was younger than me, maybe in her very early twenties. Like Mr. Cataliades, she was only partly human. Her dark red hair was spiked, her makeup laid on with a trowel. Even the striking outfit of the girl in the Hair of the Dog paled in comparison to this young woman’s.

Pink and black stockings, high heeled boots, a black ruffley transparent skirt and pink tank top. Sounds lovely. Her name is Diantha and she talks in run-on sentences. Mr. Cataliades tells her they need to look for Gladiola’s remains. So she takes off her shoes and stockings and goes to sniffing. But not like a shape-shifter or Were. What are these two? After a moment, she indicated that she has found something. And indeed it is Gladiola. And she has been cut in half at the waist. By a steel sword, Mr. Cataliades says.

Strangely, she doesn’t look like someone who has been dead for several days and none of the animals have tried to eat her. Gross but true. The lawyer (Cataliades is a lawyer in case no one knew that yet) says they must burn her because nothing will eat a demon. Wait? A demon? They are demons? Presumably demons are not evil. At least not all of them?

Additionally, the letter is missing. Cataliades says that whatever killed her had to be strong and sneaky. Then he tells Sookie to pack while they dispose of the body. She says she has to ask off work first, and since she doesn’t want to stick around for body burning, she goes to see Sam.  But first she mentions that Bill wanted to go. (Ugh I was hoping he would not get to!) Cataliades says they can’t stick around for dark to ask him. Just leave him at home, I say.

Though, on the other hand, we don’t really know why it’s so urgent that Sookie go to New Orleans now and having an ally along for the ride might not be such a bad idea. Why not just take Sam? He can take a day or two off work, too, right? Right?

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In Chapter 12, headed down South to New Orleans.

Sookie arrives at Sam’s trailer to find him, Hoyt, and Andy watching basketball. Who knew any of them were into sports? Well, now we do. She whispers to him that she needs some time off because of an emergency. Can she tell him what it is? Yes. To clean out Hadley’s apartment. But now? Charlsie quit, Arlene is just not that reliable, Holly and Danielle aren’t doing as well since Cody almost died, and Tanya is still new. So basically, Sookie is the best waitress he has. Though, I suspect that is not the real reason he doesn’t want her to go.

She says if he has to fire her, she understands, but she has to go. He seems hurt by this. They go outside and close the door. He says he would never fire her for needing time off. Until last year, she never took time off ever. He says he’ll call in some subs if he needs to. She tells him she’s going to clean out Hadley’s apartment and that the queen’s lawyer is driving her. He thinks all of this seems rather sudden. She agrees. Also she thinks he needs a haircut. You know who I think needs a haircut? Eric. But I guess vampires can’t really do their hair, can they? I’m unclear on that. Though I think they can’t or else why does Bill still have sideburns? Other than he is lame.

He doesn’t think she should go, but she has to, she says. Which is sort of true. I am curious as to what she will find in her cousin’s apartment. After a moment, he asks if she needs money. She tells him it’s not about money and almost tells him the trip is important in some unknown way but…

Sam tended to be a worrier, especially if I was involved, and I didn’t want to get him all worked up when nothing he could say would dissuade me from going.

Well, when people care, they worry. They’re not the ones who put you in mortal danger every other day. (I feel like I’m bitter sometimes.)

He suggests maybe taking Jason but Sookie says he’s got a lot going on. Sam doesn’t seem to think Jason could have anything important to do (which is kind of mean but also mostly true given his reputation and history) and Sookie gets mad. I suppose I would get mad if someone was insulting my brother, too. Even if he was kinda scummy like Jason tends to be. Sam apologizes for his comment cause he’s nice and stuff even when he’s mean.

I hated to walk away. No matter his feelings about Jason, Sam was important to me, and leaving him with this unhappiness between us shook me a bit. But I could hear the men roaring at some play inside the trailer, and I knew I had to let him get back to his guests and his Sunday afternoon pleasure. He gave me a kiss on the cheek. “Call me if you need me,” he said, and he looked as if he wanted to say a lot more.

One day, Sam. One day. I hope.

Sookie gets back home and it gets dark and she calls Bill. Selah answers, which annoys Sookie, and she informs Bill she is leaving tonight for New Orleans and if he wants to come he better be at her house in 30 minutes. They do chat a few minutes before that about Gladiola. Bill knew her, apparently. Also he says that sex with demons is “corrosive”. Whatever that means. She gets all jealous when he says Selah is showering. When will she be over him already? Ugh.

As she is finishing her packing, Sookie suddenly remembers Quinn and their date plans. She calls to leave him a message apologizing for having to cancel. She tells him where she is going though and that she’ll see him when she gets back. To my dismay, Bill shows for the trip. Oddly, Bill looks (in Sookie’s words) desperate. Why? We shall find out!

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In Chapter 13, so many questions.

The limo is nice, as limos are. (Not that I would know since I’ve never been in one, but I’ve heard they are.) She decides to share with the two supes that she was attacked on Friday. Bill’s all mad cause she didn’t tell him and she says she doesn’t have to tell him anything. They aren’t together. They’re not friends. Take that! He thinks she’s punishing him for dating Selah. Get over yourself, Bill. She informs him she was so not doing that and that she was on a date when attacked. Bam. With who? None of his business. But Quinn, she says.

Bill, like everyone else in the supernatural know recognizes his name. Mr. Cataliades congratulates her on her new boo. But she doesn’t need their approval. Independent woman, she is. But her point was, the people who attacked them were bitten Weres. She relays the details of the night and Bill is mad that Quinn took Sookie to the Were bar. According to broody and undead, Quinn issued some sort of challenge to the whole pack. Why, Sookie wonders, didn’t Quinn go straight to Furnan. Bill thinks the tiger knows about a plot to overthrow the new leader. Fuel the fire, accusing Furnan of being behind the whole thing.

Sookie wonders why they can’t just kill Furnan instead of just rebelling. Well, Were rules state death as the punishment for killing a packmaster. And unless the pack killed Patrick’s whole family, one of them would tattle on them to the Weres of America. Vampires have less of a problem with killing each other, Cataliades says. They only have to pay if they are associated with clans. Vampires have clans. News to everyone.

Still, Sookie wants to know why Patrick would want to kill her. He doesn’t like her, sure. But why would be consider her important enough to kill? You’re underestimating your awesomeness! But really, maybe just cause Patrick is an a-hole. She thinks about Gladiola. It’s still not clear as to why someone would kill her. There’s also the question of how the bitten Weres knew where she was. Someone would have had to have known where she and Quinn were going. But who had she told? Tara and Jason. And Quinn.

She doesn’t really want to think about her new potential boyfriend being behind any of it. How depressing would that be? Also, the one good thing about Quinn is that he may help her to leave Bill in the dust. I don’t think he’s guilty though. Sookie decides to rest her eyes and falls asleep. When she wakes up, Bill is beside her, her head on his lap, and he’s playing with her hair like he has a right to. For a minute she feels nice and then she gets with the program and jumps up. They are almost to their destination. Bill starts to say something but then just says he’ll help her clean out the apartment. Yeah, no thanks.

Hadley’s apartment building is a nice one. The owner lives in the apartment under Hadley’s and the queen has been paying the rent so none of the dead vamp’s stuff was removed. Cataliades gives her the key and tells her the apartment has been spelled so no one can enter but her. It’s stale inside but not smelly. Bill tries to follow her up but she shuts the door in his face. Not in the mood for chat, I guess. She investigates the apartment a little bit.

She finds some dirty towels in the bathroom that kind of smell up close so she sets them outside on the balcony for the night. Then she goes to bed (which has black satin sheets). She doesn’t like those. I can’t say I’ve ever slept between such. Sookie has an obsession with sheets, I’ve decided.

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In Chapter 14, meet Amelia.

Someone wakes Sookie up by pinching her toes. A women.

She was about my age, and she was very tan. Her chestnut hair was short, her eyes a bright blue, and she was wearing khaki shorts and a white shirt that hung open over a coral tank top. She was rushing the season a little.

Her name is Amelia Broadway, and she is awesome. Not that you know this yet. But I do. We like her, trust me. Amelia owns the building. She saw the limo the night before and figured Sookie was there. She wanted to talk but Sookie is not happy at being woken up. Amelia agrees to wait until she showers and wakes up fully.

When they start talking, we quickly realize Amelia lacks tact. She also projects her thoughts crazy well. She thought Hadley was a terrible person/vampire. Amelia shows her where the coffee and pot are and she brews up a cup. Sookie senses that Amelia is different I guess cause she asks what she is. A witch, it turns out. She is the one who spelled the apartment. She used a preservation spell to keep things exactly as they were.

We learn that Hadley had rented the apartment from her about a year before. She was already a vampire then. Amelia figured she’d be a good tenant since she was the queen’s girlfriend and all. The witch makes her money doing spells for vampires and the like. Sometimes she also conducts tours of New Orleans. Sookie offers to pay her for help cleaning out the apartment. But Amelia is so desperate for Hadley’s stuff to be out she might just help for free. Since the vamps death, there have been several break-in attempts.

She mentions Waldo and how she doesn’t like him. Sookie indicates that he is dead and Amelia ain’t even sad about it. Fact: vampires cannot become ghosts. Only humans. Also Amelia really wants to do a ready on Sookie. After a minute (she looks at her Tarot cards), Amelia is all embarrassed. She now knows Sookie is not just a regular old human. She should have figured it out before. Sookie reveals that she is a telepath and the girl says she’ll have to tell her mentor she made a wrong assumption like that. Witches have mentors in the first three years of being a professional. To become a professional you have to pass a test. Witch rules. I’ve already forgotten most of the rules we’ve learned about supes I feel like.

Sookie wants to look through her cousin’s stuff alone first so she asks Amelia to come tomorrow. The witch also bets the queen wants Sookie to comes over. Then she mentions a tall, dark, handsome guy from the night before. Bill, I guess. She says he looks familiar. Sookie explains that he works for the queen but Amelia said she thought he knew Hadley. No, Sookie says. But I say, hold up! Why would she think Bill knew Hadley? Had he visited Hadley before? This is suspicious.

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In Chapter 15, I am justified!!!!!!

So remember how I don’t like Bill? Well, I am about to have more reasons why.

This chapter begins with Sookie doing some packing. She’s thinking about how she is going to get the stuff she wants back to Bon Temps. Though, since she and Hadley had drastically different tastes, especially in clothes, not too many of those are going. Sookie spends most of the day packing up clothes and CDs and what not. When evening falls, she ventures out onto the balcony to look at the city. It’s nice, but she realizes those towels are still out there. And they smell a lot worse.

Upon closer inspection, she discovers they are covered in dried blood. What has Hadley done, Sookie wonders. She opts to check the apartment and finds a body in the closet. How many is that now? Surprisingly it doesn’t smell, but the man is naked. Guess Amelia’s spell really did the trick. She decides to go downstairs and get the witch. Amelia verifies that no one has been in the apartment since she spelled it and Sookie informs her there is a body in it. She takes the news well considering. They decide to go look at the body. He’s a Were, Amelia says. His name is Jake Purifoy. He worked for the queen at her wedding.

Sookie wonders if this was the wedding Quinn had said he was working in New Orleans. The queen is bi, Amelia says. She also says that a vampire wedding requires months of paperwork and negotiations. They don’t have to live together after they get married either. Just have to have…conjugal visits every now and then. Back to dead guy, he worked the security for the wedding. He is the one who picked Hadley up for the event. Sookie also wonders if this guy could be Quinn’s missing employee.

Amelia says she saw him when he came to pick Hadley up and then later heard the car leaving, but never actually saw him leave. But why would Hadley kill him? Sookie starts ranting about finding bodies and Amelia looks a little disturbed. Well, yeah. She suggests they call the queen and then Sookie has some crazy awful thought. She doesn’t share it with us though. But she insists Amelia use her cell to call the queen and tell them to send someone over NOW! Why? Because the corpse is moving. Uh-oh. That’s why he didn’t smell. Amelia makes the call and the two of them try to run out of the apartment but don’t make it. Jake is up and hungry. He catches Amelia by the ankle and pulls her down. Sookie tries to talk to him and pull Amelia away but the vamp sinks his teeth into her leg and she screams. Sookie tries kicking him and hitting him but he won’t let go. So she grabs a candlestick and whacks him upside the head with it.

He lets go then, eyes on her. He jumps on her and chows down on her arm. Then, like all crazed vampires apparently, he decides he needs sex so he starts trying to pull his pants down. But here comes Amelia, dragging herself across the floor. She starts chanting and then Jake is covered with blue flames. He lets go of Sookie to worry about his own pain now. Yay Amelia! Vampire policemen show up soon after and at first think the two girls are the attackers. Okay what? This makes no sense. They are the ones bleeding here. Just cause the other guy’s on fire.

Then Jake, who is flame free again, tries to attack them and they catch him and feed him some TrueBlood. The paramedics show up and take the girls to the hospital. While Sookie’s waiting in her little ER bed for a doctor to look at her arm, she thinks on what happened. Since Jake had been a Were before he died, would he be a Were-vampire? Do those exist? They do on Vampire Diaries. But thoughts are distracted when Eric comes in. Why is he in town? He apparently came to bargain with the queen about letting Sookie help him instead of her during the vampire conference thing. But she doesn’t buy it. Why not just use a phone?

She informs him he does not have some claim on her but he says he does. They’ve shared blood and sex so that means she is his. Yeah, no. He offers to clean the blood from her arm but then Bill comes in, having heard the news. Bill tells Eric he should leave because Sookie is tired (I think she is tired of both of you) but when Sookie looks at them, Bill looks regretful. Eric says he knows why Bill doesn’t want Sookie talking to anyone in New Orleans. Bill doesn’t answer. Suspicious.

She demands to know what they are talking about. Bill just says Eric should not be agitating her. Out with it! Eric says Sookie should ask Bill why he came back to Bon Temps. Because his relative died, she says. But Bill’s face says differently. She gets a sinking feeling, especially when Eric looks away, as if he doesn’t want to see her reaction to what happens next.

“Sookie, you would find out when you saw the queen…Maybe I could have kept it from you, because you won’t understand…but Eric has taken care of that,” Bill gave Eric’s back a look that could have drilled a hole through Eric’s heart. “When your cousin Hadley was becoming the queen’s favorite…”

And suddenly I saw it all, knew what he was going to say, and I rose up on the hospital bed with a gasp, one hand to my chest because I felt my heart shattering. But Bill’s voice went on, even though I shook my head violently.

“Apparently, Hadley talked about you and your gift a lot, to impress the queen and keep her interest. And the queen knew I was originally from Bon Temps. On some night, I’ve wondered if she sent someone to kill the last Compton and hurry things along. But maybe he truly died of old age.” Bill was looking down at the floor, didn’t see my left hand extended to him in a “stop” motion. “She ordered me to return to my human home, to put myself in your way, to seduce you if I had to…”

I couldn’t breathe. No matter how my right hand pressed to my chest, I couldn’t stop the decimation of my heart, the slide of the knife deeper into my flesh.

Oh My God! I knew it! I knew Bill was scummy. And a liar. And all that bad stuff. The whole time he was being Mr. Mysterious vampire and saving her life and all… he was on a job. Asshole. And to keep that from her this entire time? Get out of my life forever, Bill.

Sookie feels the same (only worse than me since she loved him and all). She tells him to GTFO and she never wants to see him again EVER!  GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT!

So he does. Eric simply pats her on the leg and leaves himself. Then, in a crazy episode, Sookie gets right out of that hospital bed and exits the hospital, giving a nurse who tries to stop her a death glare. She has to get out and then what? She doesn’t know. She decides to walk. At one point, she yells at a homeless man who wants money and then she screams at a guy who tries to flirt with her. Crazy Sookie has come out.

If we’d still been a couple when I learned what I’d learned this evening, I’d have killed him; I knew that with crystal clarity.

I feel so bad for Sookie right now. The first man to say he loved her, hadn’t. Or so she believes. Everything had been fixed. Was fake. And she feels like she fell for it because she was pathetic and jumped at the first man who pursued her. I know she’s hurting and thinks the worst right now, but I wish I could give her a hug and tell her she deserves way better than stupid Bill anyway. She thinks about how stupid she was for risking her own life to save his. She killed someone for him. Killed someone for a man who lied to her. Who cheated on her. Who should die a painful death right frickin now!!!!!!

She somehow makes her way back to Hadley’s, after hours of wandering about. Since she’s locked out and Amelia is still at the hospital, Sookie break the front window to get in. Grief is having quite the impact. She tries to wash her arm off and it bleeds some more, but she manages to find something to wrap it in. Hopefully it’s not infected and stuff. Then she goes to bed.

Just. A. Fied. I feel awful for Sookie but I can’t help but be happy about this new Bill knowledge. My not liking him has purpose now. He should just move to South America.

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In Chapter 16, eff him.

Sookie wakes up feeling miserable, but doesn’t have time to wallow because Claudine is there. Also Amelia, who has a bandaged up leg. She asks the fairy why she’s there.

After seeing Eric and Bill last night, I wondered if everyone I knew followed me around. Maybe Sam would come in the door in a minute.

Don’t even tease me like that.

Sookie asks how Amelia is. She’s fine considering she actually stayed at the hospital. Sookie’s kinda being a bitch to Amelia in this part which irritates me. Don’t take out your anger and sadness at Bill on poor sweet Amelia. She did help you not die last night. Sookie asks Claudine about being a fairy godmother, presumably in an attempt to distract herself. But we learn some stuff.

Fairies are the basic supernatural beings. From fairies (I’m assuming this means fairies evolve into) come elves, brownies (no idea what brownies are), angels, demons, water sprites, green men… Yeah, that’s a lot of stuff I know nothing about. Claudine is trying to become an angel, which we knew. Years of good behavior get them promoted and then they are assigned to look after a person. Sookie is her person. Though, she’s doing a crap job a little bit. I mean, she saved her from that fire and stuff, but she’s almost died like a bunch. She does say she can’t prevent pain, which is disheartening.

Apparently, things for Sookie would be worse without Claudine. Holy junk.

She’s not permitted to tell Sookie why she warrants a fairy godmother. (I know, I think maybe.) Then Amelia and Sookie fight about stuff and Claudine (who is not omniscient, she says) cannot confirm whether or not Hadley actually killed Jake. Also, popping around fast, like the time she appeared in Sookie’s car when she was falling asleep, is really hard to do.

Amelia gets snappy about Sookie leaving the hospital and then locking herself in the apartment by barricading the door (which she had to since she busted out that window). She wants to know why Sookie left. Claudine explains what Bill did. Suck, Amelia says. Claudine says she would kill Bill if it wouldn’t put her so many steps back from becoming an angel. It’s the thought that counts.

Then Amelia says they will find out what happened in the apartment by doing an ectoplasmic reconstruction. And in case you’ve never done one, this is what goes down. Four witches must perform it because it is a very draining spell. They recreate moments in time with magic. You will be able to see what happened in a certain location at a certain time. Like watching a 3D movie. More into that later.

Claudine decides to pass on that and reminds Sookie that she has to go visit the queen since she failed to do so the night before. But since Sookie has nothing to wear (she doesn’t want to dress scandalously as Hadley had) Claudine wants to take her shopping. Sookie is still being all depressed and the other women try to convince her Bill was just a stupid guy. But he was the first, so it is harder. F--- him, Amelia says. And I say, too.

Sookie decides to go see the queen about seven. Amelia wonders if her royal highness would pay for the ecto spell. Sookie agrees to ask and they plan to start that night around 10. Claudine treats Sookie’s arm and then takes her shopping and buys her clothes using Claude’s strip club money. Then Claudine warns Sookie to watch her mouth around the queen. Sookie is convinced that now the vamps have nothing over her since she doesn’t give a flip about Bill’s wellbeing but I’m sure they could find other ways to hurt her if she didn’t do what they wanted.

I wonder what my fairy godmother would do if I had one. Hmm…

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In Chapter 17, ectoplasm is freaky.

The queen lives in the downtown area and owns like a whole block worth of buildings. Doesn’t want neighbors I reckon. Also, she must have lots o money. The tourists love to come by in hopes of seeing a real vampire. In case the crazy Fellowship or other vampire haters show up, they will face many a (vampire) guard before they get anywhere near the queen. When Sookie gets close to the gate, a man jumps out and snaps a photo of her. The guard, Rasul, says he’s a Fellowship spy and they aren’t allowed to kill him. Sookie suggests maybe something could happen to his camera and Rasul seems pleased to make that happen.

She says she knows a witch who may could spell cameras so all pictures come out blank or something. Rasul leads her inside and tells her she smells a lot like fairy. She was with her fairy godmother, she says. He passes her to a vamp named Melanie. She explains that they have Jake and have given him a mentor to help him out. But he may not be able to remember everything that happened to him anytime soon. Eventually, but who knows how long it could be. Some of us don’t have forever.

But they’ve been feeding him humans (ones who volunteer and have to sign a waiver) to help with his transition. Melanie talks on their walk about how the queen throws her parties at a monastery she owns. Mmkay. Then she asks about Sookie being Hadley’s cousin. Hadley was okay, she says, but took being a vampire for granted. And now she’s dead. The next guard they encounter is Chester, who is also accompanied by…Bubba! They exchange compliments and he says he’s only been there a few weeks.

Chester leads her up to another floor where many more vampires are scattered about, some looking more uncomfortable and tense than others. Those must be Peter Thredgill’s vamps, she decides. Then finally approach another door where two very large vampires are standing. They are Sigebert and Wybert, real-life brothers. Well, you know what I mean. They tell her the queen is busy at the moment but a light will shine when she’s ready for Sookie. So she tries to make small talk with them. What do their names mean? Where are they from? They were German warriors who was turned by a beautiful vamp who wanted to have sex with them. The queen, as it turns out. Vampire bonds are strong I reckon. This does not forgive he who shall not be named.

The light goes on and they open the door for Sookie. Sophie-Ann and another male vamp are sitting at a table with papers scattered about. Another vampire, with short white blonde hair and blue eyes (sounds familiar…) is in the room, along with an Asian woman (also vampire) with chin length hair and a giant sword. The man at the table is the king and he is very well groomed. Sophie-Ann introduces Sookie to her new husband, who says hello and then goes back to ignoring her. The queen wants to know what happened to Sookie the night before so she explains.

When Sophie-Ann mentions Sookie’s telepathy, Peter starts paying attention. So she is the telepath he’s heard about. Stan has one, he says. Must be Barry the bellboy. She king asks Sophie-Ann if she’s trying to be like Stan. Well, no, but it could be to her advantage to have a telepath and one is available. Excuse me? Where do these vamps get off acting like Sookie is property?

Sookie mentions the ectoplasm thing and Sophie-Ann seems intrigued. She agrees to pay for it but she also wants to come watch. Peter does not want her to go. It will be too dangerous, he says, even with Andre and the twins. The queen assumes Sookie wants Bill to go but gets a stern NO! She seems surprised and Peter is angry at her outburst. Andre, the blonde dude, sets to accompany her. The king says he would feel better if Jade Flower, Asian girl, went with them. She is his own personal body guard but he has so many guards at the palace he will be fine. Suspect. These two are obviously not in love or even lust.

The queen wants updates on Jake, who has been put under extra security. Is this because he’s a Were-vamp? Still don’t know. So Sookie, Sophie-Ann, Andre, Jade Flower, Sigebert and Wybert head off back to Hadley’s place. Jake had no choice, the queen says. Yeah, Sookie replies, vampires say that a lot. It sounds like an empty excuse to me. Sookie thinks about Bill and starts to cry. The queen gives her a tissue and says she grieved for Hadley. She doesn’t say more, probably because Jade Flower is in the car spying on them all openly.

They arrive in the courtyard and the guards look around. All seems safe, they decide. Sookie finds it strange that Sophie-Ann has to have so much protection when she came to Bon Temps with only her demon lawyer and one other vampire…who didn’t even know she was there. Amelia is waiting with three other witches: a Mormon missionary-looking young guy (Bob Jessup), a sixty year old woman (Patsy Sellers), and a twenty-something Hispanic woman (Terencia Rodriguez). Sigebert seems intrigued by her but she ignores him.

The witches set up for their spell. Bob sits in a lawn chair, Terry stands on the stairs, Patsy on the landing, and Amelia inside. Sookie, the queen and Andre go upstairs to watch while the other vamps go to guarding the gate. Amelia explains that they are going back two hours before she saw Jake arrive that night. Sookie thinks about asking Amelia to come to Bon Temps with her and casting the same spell to find out what happened to Gladiola. The witches start their chant and a few minutes later, Hadley walks into the living room.

Her image is washed out and Sookie realizes that they can only see things that Hadley touches in the recreation. Like when she picks up the remote they see it, but when she puts it down it disappears. The queen seems extra interested and Sookie can tell Sophie-Ann really did love Hadley. The girl watches TV, talks on the phone, and mills around for a little while. Then someone comes to the door. Waldo is there. They talk but the reconstruction does not allow for sound so they don’t know exactly what the two are saying to each other.

He has a brochure for Marie Laveau though and is trying to talk her into going it seems. She is shaking her head no and Waldo leaves. So what made her change her mind? Then Hadley goes to the back room to get dressed for the engagement party. After doing her hair, she begins to cry. The queen speaks out to the phantom image. She is sorry. Another phantom arrives. It is Jake. They go down and get in his car. The witches fast-forward their spell to when Hadley and Jake come back. But some of the witches are looking shaky. How much longer can they keep this up?

Hadley is in tears and Jake is trying to talk to her. Then Andre starts talking. He can read lips apparently and is speaking for Hadley and Jake. Jake is telling her to get over it and she says she can’t. Sookie gets confirmation that Jake is Quinn’s missing employee. Hadley says she’s done something terrible and runs upstairs while Jake pulls out his phone and calls (presumably) Quinn. He hangs up and walks around the car. Then, a hand comes out of nowhere and grabs him. Jake is mostly pulled out of the ecto zone and only his feet remain. They thrash around and then stop. An unknown person has killed him.

He starts to disappear and Hadley runs out of the apartment. She sees the body and panics, looking around for help or for the assailant, but sees no one. She says she’s sorry but it’s the only way, and she feeds him her blood. Then she picks him up and carries him upstairs to her apartment, takes off his torn clothes, puts a towel to his neck to clean off some blood and then stores him in the closet.

She picks up her phone and calls Waldo. She says she does want to go with him after all. Then she gathers the bloody clothes and puts them in a garbage bag, leaving the towel in the hamper for Sookie to find.

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In Chapter 18, maybe Quinn’s not so bad after all.

The witches have to stop their spell since they are all exhausted. But now they know what happened to Jake. Hadley didn’t kill him, she just made him a vampire. Sookie explains to the witches what happened to Hadley the next night. Now, she realizes, Hadley must have wanted to find out what Jake would be like when he rose, given that he was a Were before he turned. She may have also wanted advice on how to win the queen back. Either way, Waldo killed her before she could do either thing. The queen doesn’t think Waldo is the one who killed Jake though. He already had a laid out plan that had nothing to do with the Were. Someone else was trying to frame Hadley, she thinks. But who? Amelia speaks up, saying someone could have paid Waldo to kill Hadley. For some reason, everyone gets all upset and jumps out of their chairs.

But Quinn shows up before anything else happens. He gets out and comes to give Sookie a kiss, as if there aren’t a bunch of vampires and witches hanging about.

Men all kiss differently, don’t they? And it says something about their character. Quinn kissed me as if we were carrying on a conversation.

So what does that say about him? Not real sure. Anyway… he wants to know what happened to her arm and she introduces him to everyone. Well, to the witches. He knows the vampires. Then she tells him about Jake and he gets a stony look. (I’ve read a lot about stony looks lately. I imagine it to look like this:

Just kidding! But LOL right?)

Quinn says he went by Sookie’s house and saw where a demon had been burned in her driveway. She explains about Gladiola and he tells her a lot of people die in her yard. Only two! she says. Though that’s not counting those who have died inside. The witches decide to go for pizza, mostly to get out of this now uncomfortable situation with the vampires. Sookie considers joining them. I don’t blame her. But Jade Flower, who seems to hate her guts, stands right in her path. The queen wants to speak with Sookie alone upstairs. Well, somewhat alone. Andre comes, too.

Once there she does an odd thing. She says the following is secret info: (why is she telling Sookie this?)

She begins a tale of her life and how she became a vampire. She grew up in France (which wasn’t France then) like a thousand years ago. Her name was Judith. When she was 12, a man came to town with influenza and everyone died from it except her and this older boy, Clovis. He didn’t like her because of her father so he raped her and started selling her out for money and food. One day they were in the woods and a vampire got him. The vamp, Alain, thought she would make a good companion though. Sadly, he began selling her out as well for things she needed and kept making her promises he would turn her. But one night some villagers figured out what he was and bound him with silver chains. They planned to burn him. She convinced Alain that if he turned her she could help him escape. He drained her and buried her in a hole she’d dug underneath him but by the time she rose, he was already dead. Shame.

Years later, she found an orphan in the woods, like her, and they stayed together. Andre. The queen says she knows Hadley was abused by her uncle and wonders if Sookie was too. Yes, Sookie admits. Sophie-Anne says Hadley talked about Sookie a lot. Yeah, she knows. The queen knows Sookie is upset that she sent Bill to investigate her. But Sookie says she’s not so much mad at the queen as she is with Bill. But why does the queen even care? Because she cared about Hadley and Sookie was important to her cousin. Sophie-Anne says Hadley was sorry for the way she treated Sookie when they were teenagers.

Anyway, the point is that the queen is grateful for getting to see Hadley one more time. Also for finding out that there must be some other plot against her. She owes Sookie now and wonders what she can do for her. (I’m not so sure why her story was relevant to all of this, unless the point was to show that she understood Hadley or something… whatever…) Sookie asks for some boxes for packing and a truck or something to get all of Hadley’s stuff back home. She also wonders if she can get out of going to the vampire conference. That would be a no. But it was worth a shot.

Sookie asks if the queen would like anything of Hadley’s. She says she does actually. Hadley had been keeping a bracelet her new husband had given her. Sookie doubts this story but tells the queen she can look in Hadley’s jewelry box. Andre goes to check and Sookie asks why Andre didn’t come with her to Bon Temps when she visited. She explains that it is because she didn’t want anyone to know she was gone. If Andre was seen milling about, they would assume she was there as well. Andre comes back. No sign of the bracelet. The queen reveals Hadley took it in a moment of anger, but she really needs it back because losing a gift from a spouse can come with serious consequences. Sookie says she will BOLO for it.

Sophie-Anne says that since they have spent so much time up there and she doesn’t want Jade Flower to get suspicious, she and Sookie must pretend to have had sex. But Sookie points out that everybody who knows her knows she’s straight as a pin. Well, then she must pretend to have had sex with Andre. Though really, Sookie would, if this were legit, rather have sex with the queen than scary Andre, she agrees. How many times is she going to have to pretend to have sex with someone? Remember Dawson? And then Claude?

Andre takes off his tie and unbuttons his shirt and then wraps his creepy arms around her. They must transfer her scent to him. He tells her to kiss his neck to transfer lipstick so she does.

“I love the smell of fairy. Do you think she knows she has fairy blood?” he asked Sophie-Anne, while I was in the process of transferring my lipstick. My head snapped back then. I stared right into his eyes, and he stared right back at me.

The queen says Andre has a nose for fairy blood. Sookie insists she was hanging with Claudine earlier. Andre pokes at her wounded arm and gets blood on his finger to taste it. Nope, Andre says. It’s her blood. Her grandmother or grandfather must have been half fairy. The queen says her blood must be why she has so many supernatural admirers. Well, how depressing is that for her. But dang! Sookie is part fairy. I wonder if that is why Eric and Bill were so obsessed with her.

They all head back downstairs. Everyone takes the hint about what was going on and no one seems to think much about it. Well, except Quinn, who looks pissed. The vampires all head to leave. Sookie thinks about the fairy blood thing. Eric will be happy, she thinks, to know that he doesn’t really care about her. It’s just her blood.

After they all leave, Quinn asks how they talked Sookie into having sex with Andre. Maybe she’s into that, he says. She lets him have it, saying she did nothing. The others just had to think she did. Then he kisses her.

This was as different as being held by Andre as I could imagine. Quinn was warm, and I could feel his muscles move beneath his heartbeat. I could sense the churn of his thoughts, which were mostly now centered on the bed he knew must be somewhere upstairs in Hadley’s apartment. He loved the smell of me, the touch of me, the way my lips felt…and a large part of Quinn was attesting to that fact.

Quinn’s phone rings, breaking up the moment.  He is not happy and snaps at the caller. Apparently, Jake is asking to see him. She tells him to go. He wonders if she would have slept with him if they hadn’t been interrupted. She says yes but she would have regretted it. She wants him but now she knows she’s easily fooled by men and isn’t interested in a one night stand. Basically she wants to wait until she knows him better and knows he plans to stick around.

And Quinn gave a perfect answer.  “Who would want just one night with you?” he said, and then he left.

That was a pretty good answer. I have to admit, this time around he’s kinda growing on me. Like a fungus, but still growing.

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 In Chapter 19, stretchy pants.

The next morning, a young dude shows up with packing supplies. His name is Everett and the queen sent him to help her pack. He’s in business school, she finds out. His professor specializes in vampire law and Mr. Cataliades had come to him looking for a daytime person for the queen. In return, he gets to sit in on cases and earn money. Seems like a pretty fair trade. She sends him off to Goodwill with some clothes and stuff just as Quinn is arriving with breakfast. After she eats, she changes into spandex pants of Hadley’s and a tank top. Quinn is very intrigued by this outfit.

They work through the afternoon, sorting stuff into piles and boxing up what she wants to keep. She also fills him in on the events of the night before. Quinn can’t think of anyone who would want to kill Jake so he figures whoever did it was trying to get Hadley blamed for the whole thing.

Sookie is enjoying herself for a bit, having fun teasing Quinn in her outfit. But he takes his outer shirt off and she finds herself affected as well. I can feel the sexual tension building. That evening Sookie hears Amelia’s thoughts from downstairs. Apparently, she and Bob spent the night together…and the morning and afternoon sleeping. She turns around to tell Quinn about the witches and finds him all up in her personal space.

“Tell me you don’t want me to kiss you, and I’ll back off,” he said, and then he was kissing me. I didn’t say a word. When the height difference became an issue (note the height reference and remember back when she made out with Sam and talked about how they were close enough in height not to have to stretch up… I wonder if that is significant or coincidental??), Quinn just picked me up and put me on the edge of the kitchen counter. A clap of thunder sounded outside as I parted my knees to let him get as close to me as he could. I wrapped my legs around him. He pulled the elastic band out of my hair, not a totally pain-free process, and ran his fingers through the tangles. He crushed my hair in his hand and inhaled deeply, as if he were extracting the perfume from a flower.

“This is okay?” he asked raggedly, as his fingers found the bottom back edge of my tank top and sneaked up under it. He examined my bra tactilely and figured out how to open it in record time. “Okay?” I said, in a daze. I wasn’t sure whether I meant, “Okay? Hell yes, hurry up!” or “Which part of this is okay, you want to know?” but Quinn naturally took it as a green light. His hands pushed the bra aside and he ran his thumbs across my nipples, which were already hard. I thought I was going to explode, and only the sure anticipation of better things to come kept me from losing it right then and there. I wriggled even further to the edge of the counter, so the big bulge in the front of Quinn’s jeans was pressed against the notch in my pants. Just amazing, how they fit. He pressed against me, released, pressed again, the ridge formed by the stretch of the jeans over his penis hitting just the right spot, so easy to reach through the thin and stretchy spandex. Once more, and I cried out, holding on to him through the blind moment of orgasm when I could swear I’d be catapulted into another universe. My breathing was more like sobbing, and I wrapped myself around him like he was my hero. In that moment, he certainly was.

His breathing was still ragged, and he moved against me again, seeking his own release, since I had so loudly had mine. I sucked on his neck while my hand went down between us, and stroked him through his jeans, and suddenly he gave a cry as ragged as mine had been, and his arms tightened around me convulsively.

Well… that was pretty hot, I must say.

He refastens her bra and they both are inwardly considering taking a nap as they hear the rain begin outside. But then they both hear something and he jumps into fighting mode, his hands becoming claws and his face bone shifting. Freaky. Sookie grabs a lamp and when the Weres run in, she takes the first one out with it. Quinn takes the next on, but then more come bursting in.

Now what? Why are they always getting attacked by Weres when they are together? Is this a bad sign?

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In Chapter 20, choot em!

The Weres manage to drag Sookie and Quinn, kicking and screaming, and throw them into a van waiting downstairs. They had to stun gun Quinn to get him in. Two of the Weres get into the front of the van after tying their captives wrists together with duct tape. They tie Quinn’s behind his back and Sookie’s in front of her. Guess they figure she is less of a threat.

Quinn also notices how they keep getting attacked and she’s convinced it is her fault but he isn’t so sure. It’s not like he’s never done anything to piss someone off, he says. He wants to say something else but can’t in front of the Weres. She reminds him of her ability. Oh yeah. He thinks at her that he has a cell phone in his pocket.  She should call the queen, whose number is on speed dial. But she doesn’t know how to use speed dial so he has to think the number at her. Someone answers and the Weres in the front seat hear. Pull over, one shouts.

Quinn asks if someone has had Sookie’s blood and could track them. Eric. Quinn quickly says he and Sookie have been kidnapped by Weres and that Eric could track them. Then the Weres have opened the door, taken the phone and pulled them out of the van. They punch on Quinn and one tells the other (Clete) that he is a dumbass for not checking their pockets. They proceed to check them and Clete pokes Sookie in unnecessary places. Quinn growls at him in a pretty terrifying way and the other guy says to leave her alone.

So they get the two back in the van and tie Quinn’s legs together with those plastic tie things that are pretty much impossible to get off without something sharp. They choose not to tie Sookie. Mistake. Hey, speaking of sharp, Quinn has partially tigered out (he can’t fully cause he wouldn’t fit in the van and might injure Sookie by accident) and his teeth are like razors. He can’t use them on himself, but he can use them to get the duct tape off of Sookie’s wrists. But it won’t come without pain. His teeth will hit her skin too, even though he’ll try not to.

She has to bite her lip to keep from screaming as he bites the tape off. Clete notices Quinn is biting her and tells George (the other guy). They don’t seem to care even though I think I would be suspicious. Not the sharpest knives in the drawer, are they? He can’t see what Quinn’s biting, but he can see Sookie’s tears. Finally, he breaks through and he turns over so she can see to his wrists. Clete tells George he stopped biting her and then turns his attention back to the road. Moron.

Quinn is using a tiger claw to get his own tape off, but there’s still the matter of his feet. She takes his shoes off, thinking that will help and it does. It takes a little work but she gets a foot out of the binding. Quinn is still working on the tape and Sookie rummages around, finding a screw driver. She knows what she has to do since he can’t. They turn off the road onto a driveway or something and she frantically shoves the screwdriver into the tape, ripping it. The Weres notice her movements and then she calls for Clete. When he turns, she shoves the screwdriver into his cheek.

Eek. That’s gross. Quinn gets his wrists apart and opens the door to the van. They jump out and take off running through the woods knowing they had to hurry because the Weres could track them. Eventually they run into a swamp. If they get in the swamp, the Weres will lose their scent. BUT, what about the alligators? Or snakes?

But Quinn goes in and she, a bit reluctantly, follows. It’s dark and cool and OMG they’re gonna get eaten by alligators. Where’s Troy? They start swimming and Sookie starts trying to distract herself from thinking about impending doom by thinking about what had happened between them earlier. They’d kind of had sex. Hey, maybe that’s what Quinn meant by a little bit of sex. They stop swimming and he gets all defensive because he didn’t think he protected her well enough. He’s a manly man, I guess. One who thinks that he has failed at life if he can’t look out for a woman.

He can help her now, she says. She sees a snake lurking and he grabs it and kills it real quick like. Man, I wonder if he does spiders too. But that’s not really what he can help her with. They need to figure out where the Weres were taking them and why. Sookie doesn’t sense any brain close to them. She does hear something slide into the water. OMG!! Dude, I am so worried about alligators right now for real. He assures her they will not be eaten and they get out of the water. They wander to an abandoned cabin to get out of the rain (still raining) and take a break.

This gives Sookie time to think about all the germs she probably picked up through her open arm wound. Also she thinks Amelia would probably have done something, since surely she heard them leave. Eric couldn’t be tracking them yet since it is still daytime. Then Quinn wants to know about her relationship with Alcide since the detective had mentioned they were engaged. She informs him that was a lie and then get a light bulb over her head.

That’s it! she says. She knows who is sending Weres after them. The Pelts! She explains everything to Quinn and they figure out a plan. Is she ever going to be free from these people? Yeah, I already know that answer.

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In Chapter 21, confession time.

Quinn decides he’s gonna change and Sookie gets a good look at his nakedness. It’s pretty much as great as she thought it would be.

If Quinn had been a gorgeous naked man, he was an equally beautiful tiger. His fur was a deep orange slashed with black stripes, and there were touches of white on his belly and face. His eyes slanted, and they were golden. He was maybe seven feet long and at least three feet tall at the shoulder.

Life of Sookie. LOL. (That was an Oscar joke.)

She hugs him and is a tad disturbed that he smells very much like a tiger. I think it’s strange, the whole concept of shape-shifting. It’s like they really become the animal, body and mind. Even though Quinn is still in there, he’s mostly animal instinct now. It’s crazy to think about. She gets to watch him pee on something, which is weird as well, but she chooses to ignore it.

They go trudging through the swamp for a while until the tiger catches wind of something. They near the edge of the woods and see a house, the two vans parked out front. Clete and George are outside. Sookie leaves Quinn’s clothes lying near a tree and sneaks to the van to retrieve the stun gun. Then while tiger Quinn heads for the Weres, she sneaks around the side of the house. Barbara and Gordon Pelt are sitting in the living room. Sandra is pacing the floors, looking none too happy.

But her creeping ends when another man in the house spots her. So she runs in real fast and stun guns him. Sandra runs into the kitchen and pounces on Sookie. They wrestle around, and even though Sandra is a Were, she is smaller and not experienced with bar fights. So Sookie gets on top and pins her to the floor. She is struggling to keep her there where Eric arrives. Guess it got dark.

Sookie lets go of Sandra and Eric tries to get the girl to look at him but she knows better. The Were tries to punch Sookie but Eric grabs her wrist and pulls till she screams and stops struggling. He tells Sookie Quinn is outside taking care of the two captors. Also Rasul has come along and has the older Pelts subdued. When Eric says Rasul also likes her, she blurts out that she has fairy blood. That explains a lot, he says. Jerk.

No, cause he couldn’t just like her cause she’s awesome or anything. She’s not special, just her effing blood. But Quinn interrupts saying he doesn’t give a rip about fairies. At least someone is getting brownie points. He’s naked too which probably gives him more points. Let’s turn this into a game of Who’s Line, only the points do matter.

Quinn has like 300 points because he’s said really awesome things to Sookie. Also he can have 20 points for being naked.

Eric did have 400 points when he had no memory but has since lost about 250 of those for being himself. But he looks good naked too so he’s at 170.

Bill has negative infinity points because I refuse to give him any and now we know he’s a liar and so he’ll never have points ever.

Alcide had about 350 before he acted like a jerk and made Sookie go to the packmaster thing. But we know he still cares about her even though he’s dating Maria Star (only five minutes after wanting to live with Sookie). He’s at 75 points.

And Sam gets 1000 points because I love him and he loves Sookie even though she is too blind and in denial that they are meant to be.

Moving on…

Sookie goes in search of Quinn’s clothes (sadly) while Sandra cusses after her. She thinks more on the fairy blood, trying not to be broody, and wonders who in her family was half-fae. Also, she concludes, the fairy blood must not be too great since it didn’t save her parents or her grandmother from dying. And all it’s done for Sookie is draw in some vampire attention which has overall proven to be a lot of bad stuff.

She gets back inside to discover that Eric has duct taped Sandra. Quinn and Sookie decide to dry their clothes (can’t be getting pneumonia) and she at least puts on some of the home owners clothes. Quinn opts for a towel. The older Pelt’s have been handcuffed and look mighty mad about it. Sookie asks them what they were planning to do to her. Torture the truth out of her, it seems. They know she knows what happened to Debbie.

After a little internal debate and asking Eric, who doesn’t give a crap, she decides to tell them the truth. She has been living with the guilt and lies for too long. When she is finished, Barbara says, well, that sounds like Debbie. Okay what? They do want to know if Eric remembers where the body is, but he doesn’t. Gordon tells them Sandra is the one who bit those two Weres that attacked Sookie and Quinn in Shreveport, but they couldn’t tell anyone because Sandra would have been kicked out of the pack. So they hired an out-of-state Were to track them down (in jail) and kill them. Cal Myers helped out with that.

Quinn says they should really take the Weres outside to the doctor. The Pelts kinda thought they were going to die though. But Sookie says she plans to let them go as long as she never hears from any of them again and they tell the Shreveport pack what they did. Sookie also wants to know if they sent Tanya to Bon Temps to spy on her. They did. Tanya was Debbie’s biological relative and wanted to help out. But she has decided to stay since she finds the bartender attractive. Sam? Back off, Tanya.

What about Gladiola? But they don’t seem to know anything about that. So she and the Pelts come to an agreement… well, Sandra doesn’t agree. They promise to leave her alone if she promises not to come after Sandra or come to Mississippi. She agrees. Sandra still seems upset and Gordon tells her that if she goes against their deal he will take her down in front of their pack. Dang dude.

Well, one problem down. I guess. Maybe. Hopefully.

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In Chapter 22, why must everything be bad always?

Sookie does not want to go to the queen’s big party (that she was invited to overnight), but now she feels like she has to. She found the stupid lost bracelet and couldn’t get Andre or Sophie-Anne on the phone. So she is at Amelia’s looking for something to wear. The witch (who BTW did see her and Quinn being kidnapped and called the queen to let them know) pulls out a lime green JLO ensemble. I’m talking short and v-cut down to her belly button.

Bob comes to do her hair cause he’s a hairdresser. Didn’t see that one coming. And then Quinn arrives to pick her up. He seems to dig her outfit. Her wrist bandages aren’t comfortable or fashionable, she thinks. But she needs them. Quinn asks about her trip to the bank. She and Mr. Cataliades went to see what was in Hadley’s safety deposit box. It had her birth certificate, a marriage license and divorce decree and a copy of her aunt’s obituary. There are also pictures from her childhood and some jewelry.

They arrive at the shindig and one thing is noticeable from the get go. All of the Arkansas vamps are wearing red, white and blue suits. Are they patriotic? Or do they want to really stand out for some reason?  Sophie-Anne did insist she needed that bracelet. She was worried about something. Sookie reveals to Quinn that in addition to the other things she did, she also made a bunch of phone calls during the day to gas stations around Bon Temps. One of them turned up an interesting fact.

There is a lion roaming around the grounds and according to Quinn it is an actual lion, not a shifter. Eek!

Inside the building they have to stop and have Sookie’s bag checked. She only has a compact, lipstick glue, a handkerchief, money and a tampon. Then she excuses herself to the ladies’ room. Once she’s done in there she has a re-bandaged wrist, an empty tampon container, and a heavy purse. Hmm… They head out into a larger room decorated with pictures of scenes from around the state. One side is human life, the other side shows vampire life. Weird.

The queen is with her husband greeting all of the guests. She is wearing long sleeves, Sookie notices. Probably to cover up the fact that she doesn’t have her bracelet on. The twins are there and of course Jade Flower and Andre. She also spots Bill and feels a loathing towards him. Then proceeds to ignore him. Thumbs up. Sookie tells Quinn that she wants him to go first and when he gets to the king, distract him. They run into Mr. Cataliades and Sookie hints that she has a surprise. She tells him she heard someone stopped at a gas station on the way to Bon Temps. Someone with a long sword. Gasp. Jade Flower. Not that it’s too surprising. I mean, Gladiola was cut in half and all. She puts a piece of paper in his pocket. When she goes to talk to the queen, her arm bandage is gone. Quinn immediately starts chatting up the king while Sookie reaches to shake hands with the queen.

Then she reaches her left hand and places something on the queen’s wrist. The vamp doesn’t react but says she and Andre enjoyed their time with her the other night. The queen raises her wrist and Andre smiles. Jade Flower does not. She looked pretty pissed in fact. Then it is Sookie’s turn to talk to the king. He says he heard about her adventures and wonders if she’ll be heading home soon. Yes, she will.

They walk away from the royals and over against one of the walls. She tells him about the bracelet. Quinn says if the king caught her without the bracelet then he would have grounds for divorce which means he would get pretty much everything she had. Someone announces a welcome to all the guests and then says the host and hostess will dance. Peter tells Sophie-Anne to show off her bracelets and she does. He is shocked, it appears, but just says yay for both bracelets. They dance and Sookie and Quinn head to get some refreshments.

An older woman starts talking to Sookie. She and her husband, both Weres, had come in right behind Sookie and Quinn earlier. Genevieve and David Thrash, she says. Sookie introduces herself and John Quinn. Wait, did we know his name? Nope. Cause Sookie says Quinn gives her a surprised look and she wonders if that is actually his name. I guess not knowing your dates whole name would have been weird or suspicious. The woman compliments her outfit, and Sookie says it’s a little scandalous for her but thanks. Genevieve says her date likes the outfit and so does another man. Sookie looks to where she is pointing. Bill. Ugh.

Sookie immediately ignores that and asks if her husband is the lieutenant governor, which he is, and they chat about that. And about Quinn and Sookie’s jobs. Sookie decides she likes the woman so she must warn her to fake a headache and leave because she thinks something bad is going to happen. Genevieve and her husband go dance and then wander out. Quinn and Sookie decide to dance as well and both seem to be convinced they’ll have real sex pretty soon.

And then… a head flies by. Quinn goes to take Sookie against a wall when people start running and screaming and fighting. And of course Sookie was correct. The king’s vampires are very easy to spot. On the one hand, sure they know who their allies are and who not to kill, but they are also easy targets for anyone who might want to kill them. Sookie gets separated from Quinn and jumps behind a pillar. Her foot finds the head from earlier. It is Wybert.

The queen and Andre are standing back to back out in the floor, weapons in hand, taking down anyone who comes near them. The king is being taken on by Chester, Melanie, and Rasul and Mr. Cataliades is giving Jade Flower a run for her money. Sookie gets tackled and then realizes it was by Eric, who says he’s protecting her. But she insists no one is attacking her and so he should really help the queen. He picks up Wybert’s head and throws it at the vamp who cut it off. Sookie gets knocked away from her pillar into the chaos but a whitecoat (bad guy) tries to grab her. She kicks him in his jewels and runs. But someone grabs her ankle and pulls her down. Jade Flower with a missing leg. Sookie tries to kick her off but can’t. Then Bill jumps on her back and breaks her spine and chops her head off. Still no points for him, but I’m glad Sookie is not dead.

Bill looks at her and then runs off. Sookie gets up and heads out of the room. She ends up in a bedroom with the king, Andre, and an injured queen. Andre shoots the king in the face twice. The queen says if Andre kills him she’ll have to pay a big fine but really money isn’t everything. Sookie gets out before Andre finishes the deed. She makes it outside into the lawn and runs into the lion. The actual, non-shifter, lion. She shoos it away and it goes… but probably because Quinn walks up in tiger form.

Andre and the queen come out and he leaps them over the wall. Since Sookie can’t do that, the tiger comes over and she stands on his back and pulls herself up on top of the wall. She has to work up the courage but finally jumps off the other side. Then the tiger jumps over. As she is wondering which will be less conspicuous (a tiger or a naked man walking down the street) Andre offers them a ride. Sookie feels like she started the fighting by returning the bracelet but Andre says the king would have attacked no matter what.

They want to know where the bracelet was. In the coffee can in the cabinet. Sookie put the bracelet under her bandage to sneak it in. she had to take the large diamond out so it wouldn’t be noticeable and put it in the tampon container. When she went into the bathroom, she took out the glue and glued the diamond back into the bracelet and then re-bandaged her arm with the handkerchief.

Amelia is waiting for them when they get back. The witch asks if maybe Sookie has an extra room at her house in Bon Temps. She tried something new with Bob and it didn’t really work out. Bob is a cat. LOL. I guess she wants to get away and try to fix him. But it’s cool cause Sookie likes cats. That’s good, Quinn says, because he’s too tired to totally change back into a human. She looks at him and sees that he still has a tail. She tells him he is so sleeping on the floor.

They head up to Hadley’s apartment and Sookie gets showered. While Quinn is cleaning up there is a knock at the door. It’s Bill. He has to talk to her. She doesn’t let him in but goes outside. He says he loved her. Really he did. At first he was only sent to meet her, but once he did, he fell for her. But she still can’t believe it.

“I risked my life for you,” I said, the words coming out in a halting sequence. “I gave Eric power over me forever, for your sake, when I took his blood. I killed someone for you. This is not something I take for granted, even if you do…even if that’s everyday existence for you. It’s not, for me. I don’t know if I can ever not hate you.” I got up, slowly and painfully, and to my relief he didn’t make the mistake of trying to help me. “You probably saved my life tonight,” I said, looking down at him. “And I thank you for that. But don’t come into Merlotte’s anymore, don’t hang around in my woods, and don’t do anything else for me. I don’t want to see you again.”

He still keeps saying he loves her but she says his words are not a magic formula that will open her heart. So she goes inside and locks the door. Quinn emerges, tail free, from the bathroom and she agrees to let him in the bed. She leans onto his chest and listens to his heartbeat as they fall asleep.

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In Chapter 23, back to Bon Temps.

Sookie and Amelia are headed out. Everett is driving the U-Haul the queen rented for her as Quinn had to go to Jake’s house for some Rite of Ascension or something. Amelia says her mentor is not happy with what she’s done to Bob. Sookie says there are some witches in Shreveport that can probably help her get him back to normal.

Amelia wants to know all of the details about what happened at the queen’s. Then she wonders how Sookie new Jade Flower killed Gladiola. She explains about the gas station and how it all made sense when she saw Jade whip out that sword. She figures that Peter thought the same as Sophie-Anne. Much like Andre, if Peter was somewhere, it would be assumed that Jade Flower was there, too. She snuck off to Bon Temps and killed Gladiola so the queen’s message wouldn’t be delivered.

Peter figured that if Sookie came to the apartment (which had been spelled so no one else could enter) then she might find the bracelet. He knew all along that it was missing and wanted to make sure the queen didn’t have it at their party which would have given him grounds to take over Louisiana and probably kill her. Sookie figures Jade Flower is also the one who killed Jake to frame Hadley and make the queen look bad.

Amelia wants to know about Bon Temps and seems very excited to be staying with Sookie, who is also happy about having some company at her house. Temporarily anyway. Amelia says Everett is going to live in Hadley’s old apartment while Amelia is gone and look after things. The witch asks how Sookie is doing with all the Bill stuff. She says there’s a big hole in her heart but that it will heal.

“I don’t want to sound all Dr. Phil,” she said. “But don’t let the scab seal the pain in, okay?”

That is good advice, Sookie and I both agree.

As we drew closer to Bon Temps, I wondered if Tanya had succeeded in getting Sam to ask her out. I wondered if I’d have to tell Sam about Tanya’s role as spy. Eric didn’t have to be confused about me anymore, since our big secret was out. He didn’t have a hold on me. Would the Pelts stick to their word? Maybe Bill would go on a long trip. Maybe a stake would accidentally fall on his chest while he was gone. I hadn’t heard from Jason while I was in New Orleans. I wondered if he was still planning on getting married. I hoped Crystal had recovered. I wondered if Dr. Ludwig accepted insurance payments. And the Bellefleur double wedding should be an interesting event, even if I was working while I was there.

I took a deep breath. My life was not so bad, I told myself, and I began to believe that was true. I had a new boyfriend, maybe; I had a new friend, surely; and I had events to look forward to. This was all good, and I should be grateful. So what if I was obliged to attend a vampire conference as part of the queen’s entourage? We’d stay in a fancy hotel, dress up a lot, attend long boring meetings, if everything other people had told me about conferences were true.

Gosh, how bad could that be? Better not to think about it.

End of book 6.

Some new developments in this one. Most notably: Quinn is in, Bill is out. We met some new characters that will be important later on, such as Amelia and Bob, and we spent more time with Mr. Cataliades and the queen. This was a pretty good book in the series and maybe I like it because Bill got what was coming. Admittedly, the first time I read this, I despised Quinn. But I actually kinda like him this time around. Maybe it’s because I am no longer die-hard Team Eric like I was the first time.

Like always though, I will not give up on Team Sam even if he got little love in this one. Sadly he gets even less in the next one I’m pretty sure. But just wait!

I am now halfway done with this series (of the books that are out anyway) and fear I may not get the other 6 read in the now 12 days until Dead Ever After comes out. But I won’t give up on my Reads either way. This will be finished! Eventually.

In book 7, we venture off to a vampire conference where things get crazy sauce. As if they weren’t already.